and now you are metamorphos’d with a mistress; that when I
look on you I can hardly think you my master.

Val. Are all these things perceiv’d in me?
Speed. They are all perceiv’d without ye.
Val. Without me? they cannot.

Speed. Without you? nay, that's certain; for without you were so simple, none else would : but you are so without these follies, that these follies are within you, and shine through you like the water in an urinal; that not an eye that sees

you,

but is a physician to comment on your malady.

Val. But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia?
Speed. She that you gaze on so, as she sits at supper?
V al. Hast thou observ'd that? ev’n she I mean.
Speed. Why, fir, I know her not.

Ďal. Doft thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet know'st her not?

Speed. Is she not hard-favour'd, sir?
Val. Not so fair, boy, as well-favour’d.
Speed. Sir, I know that well enough.
Val. What dost thou know?
Speed. That she is not so fair, as of you well favour’d.

Val. I mean that her beauty is exquisite,
But her favour infinite.

Speed. That's because the one is painted, and the other out of all count.

Val. How painted ? and how out of count?

Speed. Marry, fir, so painted to make her fair, that no man counts of her beauty.

Val. How esteem'st thou me? I account of her beauty,
Speed. You never saw her since she was deform’d.
Val. How long hath she been deform’d?
Speed. Ever since you lov’d her.

Val. I have loy’d her ever since I saw her,
And still I see her beautiful.

Speed. If you love her, you cannot see her.
Val. Why?

Speed.

my bed;

chide you

Speed. Because love is blind. O, that you had mine eyes, or your own eyes had the lights they were wont to have, when you Chid at fir Protheus for going ungarter'd!

Val. What should I see then ?

Speed. Your own present folly, and her passing deformity: for he, being in love, could not see to garter his hose; and you, being in love, cannot see to put on your hose.

Val. Belike, boy, then you are in love ; for last morning you could not see to wipe my shoes. Speed. True, sir, I was in love with

I thank

you, you swing’d me for my love, which makes me the bolder to

for

yours. Val. In conclusion, I stand affected to her. Speed. I would, you were fet, so your affection would cease.

Val. Last night she enjoin'd me to write some lines to one she loves.

Speed. And have you?
Val. I have.
Speed. Are they not lamely writ?

Val. No, boy, but as well as I can do them:
Peace, here she comes.

Enter Silvia.
Speed. O excellent motion! o exceeding puppet !
Now will he interpret to her.

Val. Madam and mistress, a thousand good-morrows !
Speed. O, 'give ye good ev’nl here's a million of manners.
Sil. Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand !
Speed. He should give her interest; and the gives it him.

Val. As you enjoin'd me, I have writ your letter,
Unto the secret nameless friend of yours;
Which I was much unwilling to proceed in,
But for my duty to your ladyship.

Sil. I thank you, gentle servant ; ’tis very clerkly done.
Val

. Now trust me, madam, it came hardly off:
For, being ignorant to whom it goes,
I writ at random, very doubtfully.

Sil. Perchance, you think too much of so much pains ?

Val. No, madam, so it steed you, I will write, Please you command, a thousand times as much.

And yet

Sil

. A pretty period ! well, I guess the sequel; And yet

I will not name it; yet I care not;
And yet take this again; and yet I thank you;
Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more.

Speed. And yet you will; and yet, another yet. [afide.
Val. What means your ladyship? do you not like it?

Sil. Yes, yes; the lines are very quaintly writ;
But since unwillingly, take them again ;
Nay, take them.

Val. Madam, they are for you.

Sil. Ay, ay; you writ them, fir, at my request; But I will none of them; they are for

you: I would have had them writ more movingly.

Val. Please you, I'll write your ladyship another.

Sil. And, when it's writ, for my fake read it over ; And if it please you, so; if not, why so.

Val. If it please me, madam, what then?

Sil. Why, if it please you, take it for your labour; And so good-morrow, servant.

[Exit

.
Speed. O jest unseen, inscrutable, invisible, as a nose on a
man's face, or a weathercock on a steeple !
My master sues to her, and she hath taught her suitor,
He being her pupil, to become her tutor :
O excellent device! was there ever heard a better?
That my master, being the scribe, to himself should write the letter?

Val. How now, lir? what are you reasoning with yourself?
Speed. Nay, I was rhiming ; 'tis you that have the reason.
Val. To do what?
Speed. To be a spokes-man from madam Silvia.
V al. To whom?
Speed. To yourself; why, she wooes you by a figure.
Val. What figure?

Speed.

Speed. By a letter, I should say.
Val. Why, she hath not writ to me?

Speed. What need she,
When she hath made you write to yourself ?
Why, do you not perceive the jest?

Val. No, believe me.

Speed. No believing you indeed, sir: but did you perceive her earnest?

Val. She gave me none, except an angry word.
Speed. Why, she hath given you a letter.
Val. That's the letter I writ to her friend.
Speed. And that letter hath she deliver’d, and there's an end.
Val. I would, it were no worse.

Speed. I'll warrant you, 'tis as well:
For often have you writ to her, and she in modesty,
Or else for want of idle time, could not again reply;
Or fearing else some messenger that might her mind discover,
Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her lover.
All this I speak in print; for in print I found it.
Why muse

you,

sir? 'tis dinner-time. Ďal. I have din'd.

Speed. Ay, but hearken, fir; though the Cameleon love can feed on the air, I am one that am nourish'd by my victuals ; and would fain have meat: 0, be not like your

mistress; be moved, be moved.

[Exeunt.

1

Jul. If you turn not, you will return the sooner :
Keep this remembrance for thy Julia's sake. [Giving a ring
Pro. Why, then we'll make exchange; here, take you

this.
Jul. And seal the bargain with a holy kiss.
Pro. Here is

my
hand for

my

true constancy:
And when that hour o'erslips me in the day,
Wherein I sigh not, Julia, for thy fake,
The next ensuing hour some foul mischance
Torment me, for my love's forgetfulness !
My father stays my coming; answer not:
The tide is now; nay, not thy tide of tears;
That tide will stay me longer than I should : [Exit Julia.
Julia, farewell what! gone without a word ?
Ay, so true love should do; it cannot speak;
For truth hath better deeds than words to grace it.

Enter Panthion.
Pant. Sir Protheus, you are stay'd for.

Pro. Go; I come.
Alas! this parting strikes poor lovers dumb. [Exeunt.

SCENE III.

Enter Launce, with his dog Crab. Laun. Nay, 'twill be this hour ere I have done weeping; all the kind of the Launces have this very fault: I have receiv'd my proportion, like the prodigious son, and am going with fir Protheus to the imperial's

court. I think, Crab my dog be the sourestnatur'd dog that lives': my mother weeping, my father wailing, my sister crying, our maid howling, our cat wringing her hands, and all our house in a great perplexity; yet did not this cruelhearted cur shed one tear! he is a stone, a very pebble-stone, and has no more pity in him than a dog: a few would have wept to have seen our parting; why, my grandam having no eyes, look you, wept herself blind at my parting. Nay, I'll show you

the manner of it: this shoe is my father; no, this left shoe is my

father;