Fal. Bardolph, follow him. A tapster is a good trade : an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a withered servingman a fresh tapster. Go; adieu.

17

Bard. It is a life that I have desired: I will thrive. Pist. O base Hungarian wight! wilt thou the spigot [Exit Bardolph. 20 Nym. He was gotten in drink: is not the humour

conceited?

wield?

Fal. I am glad I am so acquit of this tinder-box: his thefts were too open; his filching was like an unskilful singer; he kept not time.

25

Nym. The good humour is to steal at a minute's rest. 'Convey,' the wise it call. 'Steal!' foh! a fico

Pist.

for the phrase!

Fal. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels.

Pist. Why, then, let kibes ensue.

30

Fal. There is no remedy; I must cony-catch; I must

shift.

Pist. Young ravens must have food.

Fal. Which of you know Ford of this town?

35

Pist. I ken the wight: he is of substance good.
Fal. My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about.

Pist. Two yards, and more.

Fal. No quips now, Pistol! Indeed, I am in the waist two yards about; but I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife: I spy entertainment in her; she discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invitation: I can construe the action of her familiar style; and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be Englished rightly, is, 'I am Sir John Falstaff's.'

45

Pist. He hath studied her will, and translated her will, out of honesty into English.

Nym. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass? Fal. Now, the report goes she has all the rule of her husband's purse: he hath a legion of angels.

50

Pist. As many devils entertain; and 'To her, boy,' say I.

Nym. The humour rises; it is good humour me the angels.

54

Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her: and here another to Page's wife, who even now gave me good eyes too, examined my parts with most judicious œillades; sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly.

Pist. Then did the sun on dunghill shine.
Nym. I thank thee for that humour.

60

Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye did seem to scorch me up like a burning-glass! Here's another letter to her: she bears the purse too; she is a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be cheaters to them both, and they shall be exchequers to me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I will trade to them both. Go bear thou this letter to Mistress Page; and thou this to Mistress Ford: we will thrive, lads, we will thrive.

71

Pist. Shall I Sir Pandarus of Troy become, And by my side wear steel? then, Lucifer take all! Nym. I will run no base humour: here, take the humour-letter: I will keep the haviour of reputation. 75 Fal. [To Robin] Hold, sirrah, bear you these letters tightly;

Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.
Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hailstones, go;
Trudge, plod away o' the hoof; seek shelter, pack!
Falstaff will learn the humour of the age,

French thrift, you rogues; myself and skirted page.

80

[Exeunt Falstaff and Robin.

Pist. Let vultures gripe thy guts! for gourd and fullam

holds,

And high and low beguiles the rich and poor:

Tester I'll have in pouch when thou shalt lack,

Base Phrygian Turk!

85

Nym. I have operations which be humours of revenge.

Pist. Wilt thou revenge?

Nym. By welkin and her star!

Pist. With wit or steel?

Nym. With both the humours, I:

I will discuss the humour of this love to Page.

Pist.

And I to Ford shall eke unfold

How Falstaff, varlet vile,

His dove will prove, his gold will hold,
And his soft couch defile.

90

95

Nym. My humour shall not cool: I will incense Page to deal with poison; I will possess him with yellowness, for the revolt of mine is dangerous: that is my true humour. Pist. Thou art the Mars of malecontents: I second thee; troop on.

[Exeunt. 100

SCENE IV. A room in DOCTOR CAIUS's house.

Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY, SIMPLE, and RUGBY.

Quick. What, John Rugby! I pray thee, go to the casement, and see if you can see my master, Master Doctor Caius, coming. If he do, i' faith, and find any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of God's patience and the king's English.

Rug. I'll go watch.

5

Quick. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. [Exit Rugby.] An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no tell-tale nor no breed-bate: his worst fault is, that he is given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: but nobody but has his fault; but let that pass. Peter Simple, you say your name is?

Sim. Ay, for fault of a better.

Quick. And Master Slender's your master?

Sim. Ay, forsooth.

15

Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, like a glover's paring-knife?

Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with a little yellow beard, -a Cain-coloured beard.

Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not?

21

Sim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a warrener.

25

Quick. How say you?-O, I should remember him: does he not hold up his head, as it were, and strut in his gait? Sim. Yes, indeed, does he.

Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune! Tell Master Parson Evans I will do what I can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish

31