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It is a fashion rapidly gaining favor, to send with the wedding invitations and announce- The bride's ments a card giving the bride's future. address and reception day; thus,

At Home

Tuesdays, after January tenth

Nineteen, West Fiftieth Street

New York

new

address

No name precedes the formula, since no such person exists as is represented by the bride's married name at the time that the invitation is sent.

In writing invitations for an informal house wedding to which few are bidden, the wording differs according to the degree of intimacy with the persons addressed. invitations The duty devolves upon the bride's

Written

mother. To a friend or relative of the bridegroom's with whom she was not well acquainted she would write somewhat as follows:

MY DEAR MRS. LEE,

It will give my husband and me much pleasure if you and Mr. Lee will come to the very quiet marriage of our daughter Jean and your nephew Mr. Charles Lee (date and hour). We are asking but a few friends, and hope to welcome you and Mr. Lee among them.

Cordially yours.

Careful lists having been prepared of the entire acquaintance of both families, that no one be

overlooked, the invitations are sent out, about three weeks in advance of the time set for the marSending riage, either by messenger or mail.

the If sent by post, each invitation is eninvitations closed unsealed in a second envelope. In sending wedding invitations to a family of adults, one should be addressed to the parents, one to the daughters inclusive, as "The Misses," and one to each of the sons. These invitations should be enclosed in separate envelopes, and may be placed in a large one addressed to the head of the house. As a matter of courtesy, invitations are sent to the bridegroom's immediate family.

"Mr. and Mrs. Jones and Family" are no longer so designated. If the presence of the minor children is desired, invitations are sent to them. In no case is it permissible to invite a husband without his wife, or a wife without her husband, if both are accessible.

The distinction between friends and acquaintances is made in enclosing or withholding the reception card, though the size of the house. often determines the matter. A breakfast narrows the circle, usually, to more intimate friends. When bereavement or illness necessitates the recall of general invitations, cards printed in script (as described in the foregoing chapter) are sent to all the invited guests. Those whose presence is desired at the ceremony are then notified by letter.

Ceremonious wedding invitations require no answer, unless they be for a breakfast where a

seat is to be provided for each guest, but a call should be made soon after the ceremony, certainly within two weeks, upon two weeks, upon the Answering

bride's mother, or upon those in whose wedding names the invitations are issued. The invitations bride should be called upon, when it is known where she may be found. Cards are sent on the day of the function by those unable to attend the reception, addressed to those making the invitation. The bride, not being the hostess, has no recognition.

Whom to

address

People living at a distance send their cards by mail to assure their hosts that the invitation has been received. It goes without saying that this acknowledgment is addressed to the persons giving the invitation, not to the bride. If the invitation is to the church alone, no answer is required. A written invitation of course imposes the courtesy of a prompt reply. Any carelessness in regard to so flattering an attention is inexcusable.

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A story that went the rounds last winter was of a young man — name kindly suppressed - who, having overlooked an invitation to a small house wedding, worded his regret to the bride, “I would of loved to of gone!" Having added the blunder of an ignorant note to the crime of forgetting a courtesy, he was not forgiven.

Chapter Fifth-VISITING-CARD CON

VENTIONS

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HE Russians tell a story of the late Czar Alexander III. that upon the rare occasions when it was incumbent upon him to pay a call, he would take a gold coin bearing his "image and superscription," and twisting it between his thumb and finger, leave it in lieu of a card, the only man in Russia who had strength for the feat. This is the only exception I have heard of to the use of the little squares of pasteboard that for more than a century have been the accredited representatives of our personal identity.

Before they came into use, the porters at the doors or lodges of great houses kept a visitors' book in which they scrawled their idea Origin of visiting- of the names of those who called upon

cards their masters and their families. One fine gentleman, shocked to find that his porter kept so poor a register of the names of those who had done him the honor to call upon him, -badly written, with spluttering pen and pale or muddy ink on greasy paper, - conceived the idea of writing his own name upon slips of

paper or bits of cardboard in advance of calling upon his friends, lest his name should fare as badly at the hands of porter or concierge. The custom was found so convenient as to have many imitators, and soon became general.

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Freaks of fashion

Fashion, the tricksy goddess, dictated to her vo taries many styles of visiting-cards before settling upon the present one, some made with a sheen, to imitate silk, enamel, or porcelain or tinted in different shades. Others were ornamented with allegorical designs, bordered with lace paper or covered with dainty landscapes, where, as in Du Maurier's early drawings, one had to search for the name in some inconspicuous place.

Young men of fashion in New York in the early forties affected a card highly glazed, with the name in such microscopic characters as to be almost illegible, which had succeeded the custom of engraving the facsimile of the owner's signature.

We always think the last fashion the best, and that wisdom will die with us, but the fact remains that the etiquette of visiting-cards varies so much from time to time and differs

Varying etiquette

so in different places that it is impossible to formulate unchangeable rules. For instance, the code observed in Washington is somewhat different from that followed in New York, and what is correct for the residents of large cities is often too formal for people who live in suburbs

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