Enter Robert Faulconbridge, and Philip, his Brother,

Phil.

Y

the Bastard.

OUR faithful subject, I, a gentleman
Born in Northamptonshire, and eldest son,

As I suppose, to Robert Faulconbridge,
A foldier, by the honour-giving hand
Of Cœur-de-lion knighted in the field.
K. John. What art thou?

Robert. The fon and heir to that same Faulconbridge. K. John. Is that the elder, and art thou the heir? You came not of one mother then, it feems?

Phil. Most certain of one mother, mighty King, That is well known; and, as I think, one father: But for the certain knowledge of that truth, I put you o'er to heav'n, and to my mother; faid Of that I doubt, as all men's children may.

Eli. Out on thee, rude man! thou dost shame thy

mother,

And wound her honour with this diffidence. wh Phil. I, Madam? no, I have no reason for it; That is my brother's plea, and none of mine; The which if he can prove, he pops me out At least from fair five hundred pound a year: ght Heav'n guard my mother's honour, and my land!

K. John. A good blunt fellow; why, being younger born,

Doth he lay claim to thine inheritance?

Phil. I know not why, except to get the land;

But, once, he flander'd me with bastardy:
But whether I be true begot or no,

t That still I lay upon my mother's head;
But that I am as well begot, my Liege,
(Fair fall the bones, that took the pains for me!)

Compare our faces, and be judge yourself.

If old Sir Robert did beget us both,

?

N

And

And were our father, and this son like him;
O old Sir Robert, father, on my knee

I give heav'n thanks, I was not like to thee.

K. John. Why, what a mad-cap hath heav'n lent us here?

Eli. He hath a trick of Cœur-de-lion's face,

The accent of his tongue affecteth him:
Do you not read fome tokens of my fon
In the large composition of this man?

K. John. Mine eye hath well examined his parts, And finds them perfect Richard: Sirrah, speak, What doth move you to claim your brother's land?

Phil. Because he hath a half-face, like my father, With that half-face would he have all my land ? A half-fac'd groat, five hundred pound a year ! Rob. My gracious Liege, when that my father liv'd, Your brother did employ my father much;

Phil. Well, Sir, by this you cannot get my land. Your tale must be, how he employ'd my mother. Rob. And once dispatch'd him in an embassy To Germany; there with the Emperor To treat of high affairs touching that time: Th' advantage of his abfence took the King, And in the mean time sojourn'd at my father's; Where, how he did prevail, I shame to speak: But truth is truth; large lengths of feas and shores Between my father and my mother lay, (As I have heard my father speak himself) Whe When this fame lufty gentleman was got. Upon his death-bed he by will bequeath'd His lands to me; and took it on his death, That this, my mother's fon, was none of his ; And if he were, he came into the world Full fourteen weeks before the course of time: Then, good my Liege, let me have what is mine, My father's land, as was my father's will.

K. John. Sirrah, your brother is legitimate; Your father's wife did after wedlock bear him:

And

And if she did play false, the fault was hers; Which fault lies on the hazard of all husbands, That marry wives. Tell me, how if my brother, Who, as you fay, took pains to get this son, Had of your father claim'd this fon for his ? In footh, good friend, your father might have kept This calf, bred from his cow, from all the world. In footh, he might; then, if he were my brother's, My brother might not claim him; nor your father, Being none of his, refuse him; this concludes, My mother's fon did get your father's heir, Your father's heir must have your father's land. Rob. Shall then my father's Will be of no force To dispossess that child, which is not his? -Phil. Of no more force to dispossess me, Sir, Than was his will to get me, as I think.

Eli. Whether hadst thou rather be a Faulconbridge,

- And, like thy brother, to enjoy thy land: Or the reputed Son of Cœur-de-lion,

Lord of the prefence, and no land beside?

Phil. Madam, and if my brother had my shape,

And I had his, Sir Robert his, like him;
And if my legs were two fuch riding rods,

$ My arms such eel-skins stuft;

*

my face so thin,

That in mine ear I durst not stick a rose,
Left men should fay, look, where three farthings goes!
And to his shape were heir to all his land;

*

my face so thin,

That in mine ear I durst not stick a rose,

Left men should say, look, where three-farthings goes!] We must observe, to explain this Allusion, that Queen Elizabeth was the first, and indeed the only Prince who coin'd in England Three-half-pence, and Three-farthing Pieces. She at one and the fame Time coin'd Shillings, Six-pences, Groats, Three-pences, Two-pences, Three-halfpence, Pence, Three Farthings, and Half-pence: And these Pieces all had her Head, and were alternately with the Rose behind, and without the Rofe. The Shilling, Groat, Two-pence, Penny, and Halfpenny had it not: The other intermediate Coins, viz. the Six-pence, Three-pence, Three-half-pence, and Three Farthings had the Rose. Mr. Theobald.

VOL. IV.

I

'Would

'Would, I might never ftir from off this place,
I'd give it ev'ry foot to have this face :
I would not be Sir Nobbe in any cafe.

Eli. I like thee well; wilt thou forsake thy fortune,

Bequeath thy land to him, and follow me?
I am a foldier, and now bound to France.

Phil. Brother, take you my land, I'll take my f

chance;

Your face hath got five hundred pound a year,
Yet fell your face for five-pence, and 'tis dear.
Madam, I'll follow you unto the death.

Eli. Nay, I would have you go before me thither. for
Phil. Our country manners give our betters way.
K. John. What is thy name?

Phil. Philip, my Liege, so is my name begun;

Philip, good old Sir Robert's wife's eldest son.

K. John. From henceforth bear his name, whose form thou bear'st:

Kneel thou down Philip, but rise up more great;
Arife Sir Richard, and Plantagenet.

[hand;

He

Phil. Brother by th' mother's fide, give me your My father gave me honour, yours gave land. Now blessed be the hour, by night or day, When I was got, Sir Robert was away! Eli. The very spirit of Plantagenet! I am thy grandam; Richard, call me fo. Phil. Madam, by chance, but not by truth; what 100

though?

Something about, a little from the right,

In at the window, or else o'er the hatch:
Who dares not stir by day, must walk by night,
And have his have, however men do catch;
Near or far off, well won is still well shot;
And I am I, howe'er I was begot.

K. John. Go, Faulconbridge, now haft thou thy defire; J
A landless Knight makes thee a landed 'Squire :
Come, Madam; and come, Richard; we must speed
For France, for France; for it is more than need.

Phil.

ME

d t

ta

in late

Phil. Brother, adieu; good fortune come to thee, For thou was got i'th' way of honesty.

[Exeunt all but Philip.

SCENE III.

?

ear

e

A foot of honour better than I was,

But many a many foot of land the worse!
Well, now can I make any Joan a lady.
Good-den, Sir Richard, Godamercy, fellow;
And if his name be George, I'll call him Peter;
For new-made honour doth forget men's names:
'Tis too respective and unsociable

For your converfing. Now your traveller,
He and his tooth-pick at my worship's mess;
And when my knightly stomach is fuffic'd,
Why then I fuck my teeth, and catechise
My picqued man of countries ;-My dear Sir,
(Thus leaning on mine elbow, I begin)

I shall befeech you, that is question now;
And then comes answer like an ABC-book:
O, Sir, fays answer, at your best command,
At your employment, at your service, Sir:
No, Sir, says question, I, sweet Sir, at yours,
And fo e'er answer knows what question would,
Saving in dialogue of compliment;
And talking of the Alps and Apennines,
The Pyrenean and the river Po;

It draws towards supper in conclufion, fo.
But this is worshipful fociety,

And fits the mounting spirit like myself:
For he is but a bastard to the time,
That doth not smack of obfervation;
[And fo am I, whether I smack or no:]
And not alone in habit and device,
Exterior form, outward accoutrement;
But from the inward motion to deliver
Sweet, sweet, sweet poison for the age's tooth;

I 2