Val. When would you use it, sir? Duke. This very night. Val. By twelve o'clock I'll send you such a one. Duke. But, hark thee; I would go to her alone : How shall I best convey the ladder thither? Val. It will be light, my lord, that you may bear it Under a cloak, that is of any length, Duke. As long as that, I guess, would serve the turn. Val. Ay, my good lord. Duke. Then let me see it, that I May get me one of such another length. Val. Why, any cloak will serve the turn, my lord. Duke. How shall I wear it so as to concealI pr'ythee, let me try thy cloak upon me. [The Duke suddenly draws open Valentine's cloak, and discovers a ladder of ropes, with a letter fastened to it: he seizes them. What letter is this same? What's here ?-To Silvia? I'll be so bold to break the seal for once. What's here? [Reads.] Silvia, this night I will enfranchise thee: Wilt thou reach stars, because they shine on thee ?→→→→ Longer than swiftest expedition Will give thee time to leave our royal court, Begone, I will not hear thy vain excuse,- Val. And why not death, rather than living torment? To die, is to be banish'd from myself; And feed upon the shadow of perfection. [Going, R. [Launce and Proteus, without, L. Pro. Run, Launce, run, run, and seek him out. Lau. So-ho! So-ho! Pro. What see'st thou ! Enter LAUNCE and PROTEUS, L. Lau. Him we go to find: there's not a hair on's head, but 'tis a Valentine. Pro. Valentine? Pro. Friend!-Valentine!-a word. [Goes behind, R. Val. My ears are stopp'd, and cannot hear more news, So much of bad already hath possess'd them. Pro. Then, in dumb silence, will I bury mine; For they are harsh, untunable, and bad. Val. Is Silvia dead? Pro. No, Valentine. Val. No Valentine, indeed, for sacred Silvia ! Hath she forsworn me? Pro. No, Valentine. Val. What is your news?-For I can hear it now. Lau. Sir, there's a proclamation that you are vanish'd. Pro. That thou art banish'd,-that, O, that's the news! From hence, from Silvia, and from me, thy friend. Those at her father's churlish feet she tender'd; But neither bended knees, pure hands held up, Could penetrate her uncompassionate sire; But Valentine, if he be ta'en, must die. Besides, her intercession chaf'd him so, Val. No more; unless the next word that thou speak'st Have some malignant power upon my life: If so, pray thee, breathe it in mine ear, As ending anthem of my endless dolour. Pro. Cease to lament for that thou canst not help, Here if thou stay, thou canst not see thy mistress; Val. I pray thee, Launce, an if thou see'st my man, Bid him make haste, and meet me at the north gate. Pro. Go, sirrah, find him out. Come, Valentine. Val. O, heavenly Silvia! hapless Valentine! [Exeunt Proteus and Valentine, L. Lau. I am but a fool, look you; and yet I have the wit to think my master is a kind of knave. He lives not now, that knows me to be in love: yet I am in love; but a team of horse shall not pluck that from me; nor who 'tis I love, and yet 'tis a woman: but that woman I will not tell myself; and yet 'tis a milk-maid; yet tis not a maid, for she hath had gossips. yet 'tis a maid; for she is her master's maid, and serves for wages. She hath more qualities than a water-spaniel, which is much in a bare Christian.-Here is the cat-log [Taking out a paper] of her conditions. Imprimis, She can fetch and carry. Why, a horse can do no more; nay, a horse cannot fetch, but only carry; therefore is she better than a jade. Item,-She can milk: look you, a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands. Enter SPEED, R. Spe. How now, Signior Launce? Ha! what news there in your paper! Lau. The blackest news that ever thou heard'st. Lau. Why, as black as ink. Spe. Let me read them? Lau. Fie on thee, jolt-head; thou canst not read. Lau. I will try thee: tell me this :-Who begot thee? Lau. O, illiterate loiterer! it was the son of thy grandmother: this proves, that thou canst not read. Spe. Come, fool, come: try me in thy paper. Lau. [Gives him the paper.] There; and St. Nicholas be thy speed! Spe. Imprimis, She can fetch and carry :-Item, She can milk :-Item, She brews good ale: Lau. And thereof comes the proverb,-Blessing of your heart, you brew good ale. Spe. Item, She can sew : Lau. That's as much as to say, Can she so? Spe. Item, She can knit : Lau. What need a man care for a stock with a wench, when she can knit him a stock? Spe. Item, She can spin : Lau. Then may I set the world on wheels, when she can spin for her living. Spe. Item, She hath many nameless virtues. Lau. That's as much as to stay, bastard virtues; that, indeed, know not their fathers, and therefore have no names. Spe. Here follow her vices. Lau. Close at the heels of her virtues. Spe. Imprimis, She doth talk in her sleep Lau. It's no matter for that, so she sleep not in her talk. Spe. Item, She is slow in words : Lau. O villain, that set this down among her vices! To be slow in words, is a woman's only virtue: I pray thee, out with't; and place it for her chief virtue. Spe. Item, She hath no teeth :— Lau. I care not for that neither, because I love crusts. Spe. Item, She is cursed : D Lau. Well; the best is, she hath no teeth to bite. Lau. Of her tongue she cannot, for that's writ down she is slow of of her purse she shall not, for that I'll keep shut. Well, proceed. Spe. Item, She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults. Lau Stop there; I'll have her: she was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that last article: rehearse that once more. Spe. Item, She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, Lau. That's monstrous: oh, that that were out! Lau. Why, that word makes the faults gracious: well, I'll have her and, if it be a match, as nothing is impossible, Spe. What then? Lau. Why, then, I will tell thee-[Takes the paper from him]-that thy master waits for thee at the north gate. Spe. For me? Lau. For thee? Ay, who art thou? He hath stayed for better man than thee. Spe. And must I go to him? Lau. Thou must run to him; for thou hast staid so long, that going will scarce serve the turn. Spe. [Crosses, L.] Why didst not tell me sooner? Plague of your love-letters! [Exit Speed, L. Lau. Ha, ha, ha!-Now will he be swing'd for reading my paper: an unmannerly slave, that will thrust himself into secrets !—I'll after, to rejoice in the knave's correction. Ha, ha, ha! [Exit, L. SCENE II.-The Duke's Palace in Milan. Enter the DUKE and THURIO, r. Duke. (L.) Sir Thurio, fear not but she will be yours, Now Valentine is exil'd from her sight. Thu. (R.) She hath despis'd me since his exile most, Forsworn my company, and rail'd at me, That I am desperate of obtaining her. Duke. This weak impress of love is as a figure Trenched in ice; which with an hour's heat Dissolves to water, and doth lose his form : |