and

my desire of conversing with you, amidst all the agreeable entertainment which I find in my other friends. Here I express my concern for the severity with which you have received me; for those trifling and unreasonable suspicions with which you were continually tormenting me; and to tell you the plain truth, I find, that in about a quarter of a year, I began to feel great apprehensions as to the result of such unkindness; when after having consulted some very judicious friends, and sought direction from God, I came to a determination not to give you any just cause of offence; but that if you renewed the uneasiness without any just provocation, and gave me another dismission, that I would put on the man, trouble and give you no further. Then comes in that surprising demand of yours on the 5th of March, about which you know we parted. At our separation I there expressed a great deal of concern, which for the reasons mentioned above I did not care to discover to you; but which might be sufficient to convince you that you have a very large share in my affections.

I assure you, madam, that you have so, to this very moment; and my last visit to you awakened so many tender sentiments as fully convinced me that I had not conquered my heart so entirely as I before imagined. I have had but few easy hours or happy moments since I saw you; and I know not when my tranquillity or alacrity of mind will return. Instead of writing this cool letter, I could now come and throw myself into your arms with inexpressible trans

port, and repeat all the tender rapturous things which I ever said in my most elevated moments. But alas, madam, reason is stubborn and uncomplaisant; and it tells me even now, in a voice loud enough to be heard, that unless there be a great alteration in your sentiments and temper we should be but a very miserable couple. Could I have felt persuaded that I had formerly given you any just cause of complaint, we should probably have been much happier for the time to come; as I would then have engaged to avoid whatever I knew to be really faulty. Or on the other hand, could I persuade you, that all your apprehensions and anxieties have been groundless, and could I be secure that they would not return, you would soon perceive that I am not so changeable in my esteem and affection to you, as you have been ready to imagine. But when I remember how violently you were transported, at my saying, what God knows I verily believed, and what I think these very papers abundantly prove, that you had given yourself all this uneasiness, and that I had never laid any just foundation for it, I hardly dare flatter myself with the hope of such a change.

May that God, to whom I hope we have both devoted ourselves, but whom I fear we have offended, by an excessive concern about this tender affair, so convince us of any former mistakes on either side, as that there may be a rational foundation to hope for harmony and comfort in our again meeting together; or so unite our hearts to himself, that we may be easy and cheerful in our separation. If you go to Not

tingham, let me entreat you to carry no complaints along with you; not only for my sake, but for your own. I should be glad if you would send me an answer to this letter, and would call for it at Burton as I return from Leicester on Monday; but I really find, that while we are upon these terms, I cannot bear the thought of seeing you without a great deal of uneasiness.

Mrs. Jennings and Mrs. Wingate give their service to you. They are both of them most sincere and affectionate friends; and I do verily believe, that if you knew them as well as I do, you would love them at least as well. I most tenderly recommend you to the divine care, protection, and blessing. And am, with sincere respect and affection, whatever your prejudices may represent me,

Dear Madam,

Your most faithful Friend

and obedient humble Servant,

PHILIP DODDRIDGE.

Pray give my service to Mr. and Mrs. Freeman, and let them know that I am very sorry that they think me a man of so little generosity as to break off the affair merely about money; or of so little honesty as to make so false a representation of the case, as it is plain I have done if that objection lies at the bottom. I never from the beginning of the amour expected more than he proposed to me as we were going to Harborough; and if he imagined that

I made the attempt only as an experiment to try whether I could make a tender impression, and without any design of marrying you, he must think me a rascal who deserves to be hanged; and I wonder how he can make himself easy in attending upon my ministry! I bless God, I have known but little of such kind of usage hitherto, and if such insinuations are repeated, must have recourse to those private papers for my vindication, which contain as clear and ample a defence as I could wish*.

DEAR SIR,

FROM THE REV. SAMUEL CLARK.

St. Albans, May 9, 1726. I EXPECTED Mr. Some, and had some hopes that he might stay in London longer than he intended upon an overture from Mr. Clark's congregation. I wish that vacancy may be filled up with as worthy a person. There are some thoughts of inviting Mr. Guyse, but I do not hear yet of any direct application to him. See the advantage of a zeal for orthodoxy! I heartily sympathize with you in your disappointment as to Mrs. Catharine Freeman. sensible how much disquietude the affair must have given you, but I am pleased to see that you en

I am

*The papers alluded to in this letter were destroyed by the Rev. Job Orton for reasons which will hereafter be mentioned. They were of the most private character; and, whatever the fond prejudice of a lover might excuse, yet Catharine Freeman should not have perused them clandestinely.

deavour to make the best of it. It is indeed sometimes necessary that we should be taught that there is not that bliss in earthly enjoyments which we fondly expected. It seems unaccountable that your mistress should charge you with leaving her when the obstructions have always arisen from herself and her friends! Will she and they now accept you?-How unreasonable soever her reflections be, I do not doubt but that you will have the prudence to say as little about the matter as possible, except where it is necessary for your own vindication. The world, generally speaking, do only divert themselves with the breaches between a lover and his mistress, and perhaps at the expense of both.

I have been reading lately with a great deal of pleasure Rapin's History of England, translated by Tindal; and though I am no friend to the present method of retailing books by piece-meal, which I look upon as an imposition upon the public, I have resolved to have all the volumes of that history as fast as they are printed; the author, though a foreigner, has given the best account of our English affairs that is extant, and the translator has done his part very well, and added to the value of the performance by his useful notes.

By your account of the murder at Leicester it seems strange that the gentlewoman should be executed, for it appears to have been rather an act of sudden frenzy than a wilful deliberate crime. What a mercy is it to have the composed use of our reason continued to us!