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Oli. Let the garden door be shut, and leave me to my hearing [Exeunt Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Maria.
SC EN E III.
Vio. My duty, madam, and most humble service.
Oli. My servant, Sir? 'Twas never merry world,
V10. And he is yours, and his must needs be yours:
your servant, madam. Oli. For him, I think not on him : for his thoughts, 'Would they were blanks, rather than filled with me!
V10. Madam, I come to whet your gentle thoughts
Oli. O, by your leave, I pray you;-
Vio. Dear lady:
OLI. Give me leave, I beseech you: I did send,
hard construction must I sit,
That tyrannous heart can think? to one of your receiving
V10. I pity you.
V10. No, not a grice; for 'tis a vulgar proof,
Oli, Why then, methinks, 'tis time to smile again;
Vio. Then westward hoe:
Oli. Stay, pr’ythee tell me, what thou think'st of me?
do think, you are not what you are.
Vio. Would it be better, madam, than I am?
OLI. O, what a deal of scorn looks beautiful
I love thee so, that, maugre all thy pride,
V10. By innocence I swear, and by my youth,
Oli. Yet come again ; for thou, perhaps, may'st move That heart, which now abhors, to like his love. [Exeunt. SCENE IV. Changes to an apartment in Olivia's house.
Erter Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Fabian,
Sir And Marry, I faw your neice do more favours to the duke's serving-man, than ever she bestow'd on me. I. saw't, i'th'orchard.
Sir To. Did she see thee the while, old boy, tell ine that.' Sir And. As plain as I see you now.
FAB. This was a great argument of love in her towards you.
Sir AND. Slight! will you make an ass o'me ?
Fab. I will prove it legitimate, fir, upon the oaths of Judgment and Reason.
Sir To. And they have been grand jury-men liące before Nogh was a failor,
FAB. She did shew favour to the youth in your sight, only to exasperate you, to awake your dormouse valour, to put fire in your heart, and brimstone in your liver. You should then have accosted her, with some excellent jests, fire-new from the mint; you should have bang’d the youth into dumbne's. This was look'd for at your hand, and this was baulkt. The double gilt of this opportunity you let time wash off, and you are now fail'd into the north of my lady's opinion ; where you will hang like an isicle on a Dutchman's beard, unless you do redeem it by some laudable attempt, either of valour or policy.
Sir AND. And't be any way, it must be with valour; for policy I hate : I had as lief be a Brownist, as a politician.
Sir To. Why then, build me thy fortunes upon the basis of valour; challenge me the duke's youth to fight with him; hurt him in eleven places; my niece shall take note of it; and assure thyself, there is no love-broker in the world can more prevail in man's commendation with woman, than report of valour,
FAB. There is no way bu this, Sir Andrew.
Sir To. Go, write in a martial hand; be curst and brief : it is no matter how witty, so it be eloquent, and full of invention; taunt him with the license of ink; if thou THOU'st him some thrice, it shall not be amiss , and as many lies as will lye in thy sheet of paper, although the meet were big enough for the bed of Ware in England; let 'em
own, go about it. Let there be gall enough in thy ink, tho'thou write with a goose-pen, no matter : about it.
Sir AND. Where shall I find you?
(Exit Sir Andrew
Fab. This is a dear manikin to you, Sir Toby.
Sir To. I have been dear to him, lad, some two thousand strong or fo.
Fac. We shall have a rare letter from him ; but you'll not deliver't,
Sir To. Never trust me then; and by all means stir on the youth to an answer. I think, oxen and wainropes cannot hale them together. For Andrew, if he were opened, and you find so much blood in his liver as will clog the foot of a flea, l'll eat the rest of the anatomy.
FAB. And his opposite, the youth, bears in his visage no great presage of cruelty.
Enter Maria. Sir To. Look, where the youngest wren of nine comes.
Mar. If you desire the spleen, and will laugh yourself into stitches, follow me: yond gull Malvolio is turned heathen, a very renegado; for there is no christian, that means to be fav’d by believing rightly, can ever believe such impossible passages of grossness. He's in yellow stockings.
Sir To. And cross-garter'd ?
Mar. Most villainously; like a pedant that keeps a school i'th' church-I have dogg'd him, like his murtherer. He does obey every point of the letter, that I dropt to betray him. He does smile his face into more lines than is in the new map, with the augmentation of the Indies ; you have not seen such a thing as 'tis; I can hardly forbear hurling things at him. I know, my lady will strike him; if the do, he'll smile, and take't for a great favour.
Sir To. Come, bring us, bring us where he is. (Exeunto