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And as I find her, fo am I affected.

'Till then, farewel, Sir; fhe must needs go in, Her father will be angry.

[Exe. Mrs. Page and Ann.

Fent. Farewel, gentle miftrefs; farewel, Nan..

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Quic. This is my doing now. Nay, faid I, will you caft away your child on a fool, and a physician? look on master Fenton: this is my doing.

Fent. I thank thee; and I pray thee, once to-night Give my fweet Nan this ring: there's for thy pains. [Exit.

Quic. Now heav'n fend thee good fortune! A kind heart he hath, a woman would run through fire and water for fuch a kind heart. But yet, I would my mater had miftrefs Ann, or I would Mr. Slender had her; or, in footh, I would Mr. Fenton had her. I will, do what I can for them all three, for fo I have promis'd; and I'll be as good as my word, but fpeciously for Mr. Fenton. Well, I muft of another errand to Sir John Falstaff from my two miftreffes; what a beast am I to flack it?

SCENE, changes to the Garter-Inn.

Enter Falstaff and Bardolph.

Ardolph, I fay.

Fal. B Bard. Here, Sir.

[Exit,

Fal. Go fetch me a quart of fack, put a toaft in't. [Exit Bard.] Have I liv'd to be carry'd in a basket, likė a barrow of butchers offal, and to be thrown into the Thames? well, if I be ferv'd fuch another trick, I'l have my brains ta'en out and butter'd, and give them to a dog for a new-year's gift. The rogues flighted me into the river, with as little remorfe (20) as they

would

(20) As they would have drown'd a blind bitch's puppies.] I have ventur'd to tranfpofe the adjective here, againft the authority of the printed copies. I know, in horíes, a colt from a blind ftallion lofes much of the value it might otherwife have; but are puppies ever drown'd the fooner, for coming from a blind bitch? Two other paffages in cur Author countenance the tranfpofition I have made.

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would have drown'd a bitch's blind puppies, fifteen ith' litter; and you may know, by my fize, that I have a kind of a'acrity in finking: if the bottom were as deep as hell, I fhould down. I had been drown'd, bot that the shore was fhelvy and fhallow; a death that I abhor; for the water fwells a man; and what a thing fhould I have been, when I had been fwell'd? I should have been a mountain of mummy.

Enter Bardolph.

Now, is the fack brew'd?

Bard. Here's Mrs. Quickly, Sir, to fpeak with you. Fal. Come, let me pour in fome fack to the Thameswater; for my belly's as cold as if I had fwallow'd fnow-balls, for pills to cool the reins. Call her in. Bard. Come in woman.

Enter Miftrefs Quickly.

Quic. By your leave: I cry you mercy. Give your worthip good morrow.

Fal. Take away thefe challices: go brew me a pottle of fack finely.

Bard. With eggs, Sir?

Fal. Simple of itfelf: I'll no pullet-fperm in my brewage. How now ?

Quic. Marry, Sir, I come to your worship from miftrefs Ford.

Fal. Miftrefs Ford? I have had Ford enough; I was thrown into the Ford; I have my belly full of Ford.

Quic. Alas the day! good heart, that was not her fault: fhe does fo take on with her men; they mistook their erection.

Fal. So did I mine, to build on a foolish woman's promife.

Launce, in 2 Gent. of Verona.

One, that I fav'd from drowning, when three or four of his

blind brothers and fifters went to it.

And, Iago, in Othello:

Come, be a man; drown thyfelf? drown cats and blind puppies.

Quic. Well, the laments, Sir, for it, that it would yern your heart to fee it. Her husband goes this morning a birding; fhe defires you once more to come to her between eight and nine, I muft carry her word quickly; fhe'll make you amends, I warrant you.

Fal. Well, I will vifit her; tell her fo, and bid her think, what a man is: let her confider his frailty, and then judge of my merit.

Quic. I will tell her.

Fal. Do fo. Between nine and ten, fay'st thou ?
Quic. Eight and nine, Sir.

Fal. Well, be gone; I will not miss her.

Quic. Peace be with you, Sir.

[Exit.

Fal. I marvel, I hear not of mafter Brook; he fent me word to ftay within: I like his money well. Oh, here he comes.

Enter Ford.

Ford. Blefs you, Sir.

Fal. Now, mafter, Brook, you come to know what hath pafs'd between me and Ford's wife.

Ford. That, indeed, Sir John, is my bufinefs. Fal. Mafter Brook, I will not lye to you; I was at her house the hour fhe appointed me.

Ford. And you fped, Sir?

Fal. Very ill-favour'dly, mafter Brook.

Ford. How, Sir, did the change her determination ? Fal. No, mafter Brook; but the peaking cornuto her husband, mafter Brook, dwelling in a continual larum of jealoufy, comes me in the instant of our encounter; after we had embrac'd, kifs'd, protested, andi as it were fpoke the prologue of our comedy; and at his heels a rabble of his companions, thither provos'd. and inftigated by his diftemper, and, forfooth, to fearch his houfe for his wife's love..

Ford. What, while you were there ?

Fal. While I was there.

Ford. And did he fearch for you, and could not find you?

Fal. You fhall hear. As good luck would have it,

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comes in one mistrefs Page, gives intelligence of Ford's approach, and by her invention, and Ford's wife's diftraction, they convey'd me into a buck-basket.

Ford. A buck-basket?

Fal. Yea, a buck-basket; ramm'd me in with foul fhirts and imocks, focks, foul stockings, and greafy napkins; that, maiter Brook, there was the rankeit compound of villainous fmell, that ever offended noftril.

Ford. And how long lay you there?

Fal. Nay, you fhall hear, mafter Brook, what I have fuffer'd, to bring this woman to evil for your good. Being thus cramm'd in the basket, a couple of Ford's knaves, his hinds, were call'd forth by their mistress, to carry me in the name of foul cloaths to Datchet lane; they took me on their shoulders, met the jealous knave their master in the door, who afk'd them once or twice what they had in their basket; I quak'd for fear, left the lunatic kuave would have fearch'd it; but fate, ordaining he should be a cuckold, held his hand. Well, on went he for a fearch, and away went I for foul cloaths; but mark the fequel, maiter Brook; I fuffered the pangs of three egregious deaths: first, an intolerable fright, to be detected by a jealous rotten bell-weather; next to compafs'd like a good bilbo, in the circumference of a peck, hilt to point, heel to head; and then to be ftopt in, like a strong diftillation, with flinking cloaths that fretted in their own greafe: think of that, a man of my kidney; think of that, that am as fubject to heat as butter; a man of continual diffolution and thaw; it was a miracle to 'fcape fuffocation. And in the height of this bath, when I was more than half few'd in grease, like a Dutch dish, to be thrown into the Thames, and cool'd glowing hot, in that furge, like a horfe-fhoe; think of that; hiffing hot; think of that, mafter Brook.

Ford. In good fadnefs, Sir, I am forry that for my fake you fuffr'd all this. My fuit is then defperate; you'll undertake her no more?

Fal. Matter Breck, I will be thrown into Etna, as I

have been into Thames, ere I will leave her thus. Her husband is this morning gone a birding; I have receiv'd from her another embaffy of meeting; 'twixt eight and nine is the hour, mafter Brook.

Ford. 'Tis paft eight already, Sir.

Fal. Is it I will then addrefs me to my appointment. Come to me at your convenient leifure, and you shall know how I fpeed; and the conclufion fhall be crown'd with your enjoying her; adieu, you fhall have her, master Brook; master Brook, you shall cuckold Ford. [Exit.

Ford. Hum! ha! is this a vifion? is this a dream? do I fleep? mafter Ford, awake; awake, mafter Ford; there's a hole made in your beft coat, mafter Ford; this 'tis to be married! this 'tis to have linen and buck-baskets! well, I will proclaim myself what I am; I will now take the leacher; he is at my house; he cannot 'scape me; 'tis impoffible, he fhould; he can~not creep into a half-penny purfe, nor into a pepperbox. Bat, left the devil that guides him fhould aid him, I will fearch impoffible places; tho' what I am I cannot avoid, yet to be what I would not, fhall not make me tame: if I have horns to make one mad, let: the proverb go with me, I'll be horn-mad.

[Exit.

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SCENE, Page's Houfe.

Enter Mifres Page; Mistress Quickly, and William..

Mrs. PAGE.

S he at Mr. Ford's already, think'st thon?

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Quic. Sure, he is by this, or will be prefently; but truly he is very courageous mad, about his throwing into the water; Mrs. Ford defires you to come fuddenly.. Mrs. Page. I'll be with her by and by; I'll but bring my young man here to fchool. Look, where his mafter

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