XCIV. Dr. Johnson.

Dr. Johnson, being asked by a lady why he so constantly gave money to beggars, replied with great feeling, "Madam, to enable them to beg on."

XCV. The Graces.

Of an actress who was remarkably awkward with her arms, Foote said, "she kept the Graces at arm's-length."

XCVI. Rich, the Manager.

Rich, the patentee of Covent-garden Theatre, had many eccentricities of character; and one of the number was his constant forgetfulness of the names of his performers, as well as those of his most intimate friends. In a conversation one day with Foote, he called him "Muster Footy." The other looking grave upon this, Rich made an apology; and said, "he was so unfortunately absent in that respect, that it was no unusual thing in him to forget his

own

name."-" Why, that is singular

enough," said Foote; "for though I knew you could never write it, I did not think you could forget it."

XCVII. Mode of Burying Attorneys in London.

A gentleman in the country who had just buried a rich relation, who was an attorney, was complaining to Foote, who happened to be on a visit with him, of the very great expenses of a country funeral, in respect to carriages, hatbands, scarves, &c. "Why, do you bury your attorneys here?" asked Foote, gravely. "Yes, to be sure we do: how else?"-"Oh! we never do that in London." "No!" said the other, much surprised; "how do you manage?"-"Why, when the patient happens to die, we lay him out in a room over night by himself, lock the door, throw open the sash, and in the morning he is entirely off."-"Indeed!" said the other in amazement; "what becomes of him?" "Why, that we cannot exactly tell, not being acquainted with supernatural causes. All

that we know of the matter is, that there's a strong smell of brimstone in the room the next morning."

XCVIII. Conjugal Love.

A person praising the affections of the widows of Malabar, who burn themselves on a funeral pile in honour of their husbands' memory; Foote observed, "that the women of England claimed a higher honour; for they frequently burned before marriage for their first husband, and afterwards for a second."

XCIX. How to repair a House.

A friend telling Foote that he had just purchased a house which he thought a good bargain, though he doubted, from its being so old, whether it would stand the lease; "What sort of next-door neighbours have you?" demanded he.-" Why, what have my next-door neighbours to say to my house?”

"More than you seem aware of; for by your own account, a great deal of your

safety depends upon their being good house

holders."

c. Sir Joseph M.

The above baronet, who was a distiller by profession, having made a speech in parliament in favour of administration, in the course of which, as the lawyers say, "he proved rather too much," the opposition next day were jesting with Foote about it. "Ah!" said the latter, " Sir Joseph would be a very good kind of man, if he would only bring out with him, what he generally leaves at home,-a still-head."

CI. Garrick.

The Lying Valet being one night added as an after-piece to the admirable comedy of The Devil upon Two Sticks, Garrick, coming into the green-room, cried out to Foote, "Well, Sam! I see, after all, you are glad to take up with one of my farces." "Why, yes, David," said the other, "what could I do better? I must have some ventilator for this excessive hot weather."

CII. Duke of Leinster.

Foote, dining one gala day at the Duke of Leinster's in Dublin, where all the family plate was brought out, and the table covered with a profusion of made dishes, happened on the same night to sup at the Countess of Brandon's; who, seeing him eat rather heartily, cried out, "Why, Foote, I thought you dined with the duke to-day, who entertains in the grandest style of any man in Ireland?"- "That may be so, my lady; but it is not in my style to dine in a silversmith's shop and have all the victuals brought from the apothecary's."

CIII. Dibble Davis.

The players rallying Dibble Davis one morning in the green-room on the awkward cut of a new coat, he apologized for his own taste by saying "it was the fault of his taylor."-"Yes," said Foote, "poor man ; and his misfortune too.”