Speed. Here follow her vices. Laun. Close at the heels of her virtues. Speed. Item, She is not to be kiss'd fasting, in respect of her breath. Laun. Well, that fault may be mended with a breakfast: Read on. Speed. Item, She hath a sweet mouth. Laun. That makes amends for her sour breath. 320 Laun. It's no matter for that, so she sleep not in her talk. Speed. Item, She is slow in words. Laun. O villain! that set down among her vices! To be slow in words, is a woman's only virtue: I pray thee, out with't; and place it for her chief virtue. Speed. Item, She is proud. 330 Laun. Out with that too; it was Eve's legacy, and cannot be ta'en from her. Speed. Item, She hath no teeth. Laun. I care not for that neither, because I love crusts. Speed. Item, She is curst. Laun. Well; the best is, she hath no teeth to bite. Speed. Item, She will often praise her liquor. Laun. If her liquor be good, she shall: if she will not, I will; for good things should be praised. Speed. Item, She is too liberal. 341 Laun. Of her tongue she cannot; for that's writ. down, she is slow of: of her purse she shall not; for that that I'll keep shut: now of another thing she may; and that I cannot help. Well, proceed. Speed. Item, She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults. : Laun. Stop there; I'll have her she was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that last article : Rehearse that once more. Speed. Item, She hath more hair than wit→ 351 Laun. More hair than wit-it may be; I'll prove it: The cover of the salt hides the salt, and therefore it is more than the salt the hair, that covers the wit, is more than the wit; for the greater hides the less. What's next? Speed. And more faults than hairs Laun. That's monstrous : Oh, that that were out ! Speed.-And more wealth than faults. ვნი Laun. Why, that word makes the faults gracious: Well, I'll have her: And if it be a match, as nothing is impossible Speed. What then? Laun. Why, then will I tell thee-that thy master stays for thee at the north gate. Speed. For me! Laun. For thee! ay; who art thou? he hath staid for a better man than thee. Speed. And must I go to him? 370 Laun. Thou must run to him, for thou hast staid so long, that going will scarce serve the turn. Speed. Why didst not tell me sooner? pox on your love-letters! Laun. Now will he be swing'd for reading my letter; An unmannerly slave, that will thrust himself into secrets!—I'll after, to rejoice in the boy's correction. [Exeunt. SCENE 11.A Enter Duke and THURIO, and PROTHEUS behind. Duke. Sir Thurio, fear not, but that she will love you, Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight. Thu. Since his exile she hath despis'd me most, Forsworn my company, and rail'd at me, ვზი That I am desperate of obtaining her. Duke. This weak impress of love is as a figure How now, 390 Duke. My daughter takes his going heavily. Protheus, the good conceit I hold of thee (For thou hast shewn some sign of good desert), Makes me the better to confer with thee. Pro. Pro. Longer than I prove loyal to your grace, Let me not live to look upon your grace. 399 Duke. Thou know'st, how willingly I would effect The match between Sir Thurio and my daughter. Pro. I do, my lord. Duke. And also, I do think, thou art not ignorant How she opposes her against my will. Pro. She did, my lord, when Valentine was here. Duke. Ay, and perversely she perseveres so. What might we do to make the girl forget The love of Valentine, and love Sir Thurio? Pro. The best way is, to slander Valentine With falsehood, cowardice, and poor descent; Three things that women highly hold in hate. Duke. Ay, but she'll think, that it is spoke in hatę. Pro. Ay, if his enemy deliver it: Therefore it must, with circumstance, be spoken By one, whom she esteemeth as his friend. 410 Duke. Then you must undertake to slander him, Pro. And that, my lord, I shall be loth to do: 'Tis an ill office for a gentleman; Especially, against his very friend. Duke. Where your good word cannot advantage him, Your slander never can endamage him; Therefore the office is indifferent, Being entreated to it by your friend. 420 Pro. You have prevail'd, my lord: if I can do it, By aught that I can speak in his dispraise, She shall not long continue love to him. Bu But say, this weed her love from Valentine, It follows not that she will love Sir Thurio. Thu. Therefore as you unwind her love from him, Lest it should ravel, and be good to none, You must provide to bottom it on me : Which must be done, by praising me as much As you in worth dispraise Sir Valentine. 430 Duke. And, Protheus, we dare trust you in this kind; Because we know, on Valentine's report, You are already love's firm votary, And cannot soon revolt and change your mind. Where you with Silvia may confer at large; 440 And, for your friend's sake, will be glad of you; poesy. Pro. Say, that upon the altar of her beauty You sacrifice your tears, your sighs, your heart : Write, till your ink be dry; and with your tears Moist it again; and frame some feeling line, That may discover such integrity : 450 For |