of the word of God, as a word of life; as the light of life; a sweet, excellent, life-giving word; accompanied with a thirsting after that word, that it might dwell richly in my

heart.

Often since I lived in this town, I have had very affecting views of my own sinfulness and vileness; very frequently to such a degree as to keep me in a kind of loud weeping, sometimes for a considerable time together; so that I have often been forced to shut myself up. Though I trust the wonderful grace of God has made me differ from my former self, and from a world that lieth in wickedness, I have had a vastly greater sense of my own sinfulness, and the badness of my heart, than ever I had before my conversion. I know it was a sink of iniquity before, but alas! I did not see it. It has often appeared to me, that if God should mark iniquity against me, I should appear the chief of sinners, and that my place would be in hell. When others, that have come to talk with me about the concerns of their soul, have expressed the sense they have had of their own wickedness, I thought their expressions seemed exceedingly faint and feeble to represent my sinfulness.

My sinfulness, as I am in myself, has long appeared to me perfectly ineffable, and swallowing up all thought and imagination; like an infinite deluge, or mountains over my head. I know not how to express better what my sins appear to me to be, than by heaping infinite npon infinite, and multiplying infinite by infinite. Very often, for these many years, these expressions are in my mind, and in my mouth, "Infinite upon infinite.-Infinite upon infinite!" When I look into my heart, and take a view of my sinfulness, it looks like an abyss deeper than hell. And it appears to me, that were it not for free grace, exalted and raised up to the infinite height of all the fulness and glory of the great Jehovah, and the arm of his power and grace stretched forth in all the majesty of his power, and in all the glory of his sovereignty, I should appear sunk down in my sins, far beyond the sight of every thing but the eye of that grace which can pierce even down to such a depth. And yet, when I have had turns of weeping and crying for my sins, I thought I knew at the time that my repentance was nothing to my sin.

I have greatly longed of late for a broken heart, and to lie low before God; and, when I ask for humility, I cannot bear the thoughts of being no more humble than other Christians. It seems to me, that though their degrees of humility may be suitable for them, yet it would be a vile self-exaltation in me not to be the lowest in humility of all mankind. Others speak of their longing to be "humbled to the dust:" that may be a proper expression for them; but I always think of myself, that I ought, and it is an expression that has long been natural for me to use in prayer, "to lie infinitely low before God." And it is affecting to think how ignorant I was, when a young Christian, of the depths of wickedness, pride, hypocrisy, and deceit, left in my heart.

I have a much greater sense of my universal, exceeding dependance on God's grace and strength, of late, than Ĭ used formerly to have; and have experienced more of an abhorrence of my own righteousness. And yet I am greatly afflicted with a proud and self-righteous spirit, much more sensibly than I used to be formerly. I see that serpent rising and putting forth its head continually, every where, all around me.

Though it seems to me that, in some respects, I was a far better Christian, for two or three years after my first conversion, than I am now, and lived in a more constant delight and pleasure, yet, of late years, I have had a more full and constant sense of the sovereignty of God, and a delight in his righteous government, and have had more of a sense of the glory of Christ, as a Mediator revealed in the Gospel. On one Saturday night, in particular, I had such a discovery of the excellency of the Gospel above all other doctrines, that I could not but say to myself, "This is my chosen light, my chosen doctrine;" and of Christ, "This is my chosen Prophet." It appeared sweet, beyond all expression, to follow Christ, and to be taught, and enlightened, and instructed by him; to learn of him, and live to him. Another Saturday night, (January, 1739,) I had such a sense of the blessedness of walking in the way of duty; of doing that which is right and meet to be done, and agreeable to the holy mind of God, that it caused me to break forth into a kind of loud weeping for a long time, so that I was forced to shut my

16

CONVERSION OF PRESIDENT EDWARDS.

[264 self up, and fasten the doors. I could not but, as it were, cry out, "How happy are they which do that which is right in the sight of God! They are blessed indeed, they are the happy ones!" I had, at the same time, a very affecting sense how meet and suitable it is that God should govern the world, and order all things according to his own pleasure; and I rejoiced in it, that God reigns, and that his will is done.

NOTE.-President Edwards was born at Windsor, Con. October 5, 1703; graduated at Yale College, September, 1720; preached in New-York eight months in 1722-3; was appointed tutor at Yale College, September, 1724; ordained at Northampton, Mass. February 15, 1727; dismissed, June 22, 1750; stationed as a missionary to the Indians at Stockbridge, August, 1751, where he wrote his Treatise on the Will; elected President of New-Jersey College, October, 1757; died, March, 1758, aged 54.The above account of his religious exercises was found among his papers at his death, and is supposed to have been written at Northampton, when he was about forty years of age, for his own private advantage.

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THE PRINCIPAL CITIES AND TOWNS

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THE WORD OF
OF GOD.

PREACHING is an ordinance of God, not entirely confined to the Christian dispensation. From the Old Testament History it appears that Ezra, upon the return of the Jews from Babylon, assembled them in the streets of Jerusalem; and ascending a stage or pulpit, for the advantage of being better seen and heard, read the Law in the ears of the people, and gave the interpretation thereof. From that time Synagogues were erected in all the cities throughout Judea, and regular officers appointed to read, first the Pentateuch, and, after the persecution by Antiochus, the Prophets, and explain them in ample paraphrases or comments. Such was the origin of preaching.

When the fulness of time was come for God, in his infinite mercy, to send forth his Son, his appearance was first announced by John's proclaiming in the wilderness, "Prepare ye the way of the Lord;" which, after a short time, was succeeded by the personal ministry of Christ and his apostles, with whom the dispensation of the Gospel, properly speaking, commenced. After his resurrection, our Lord extended the commission of the Apostles to all nations: "Go ye into all the world, and preach the Gospel to every creature." Upon the formation of Christian Churches, an order of men was appointed for the express purpose of preaching the word and administering the sacraments, wherein the wisdom and kindness of the Great Head of the Church is eminently conspicuous; for such are the necessary avocations of life, so little the leisure most Christians possess for the acquisition of knowledge, and such the deficiency of many in the elementary parts of education, that they will always, under the blessing of God, be chiefly indebted to this appointment for any extensive acquaintance with divine truth.

The privilege of reading the Scriptures in our native language, is of inestimable value: but were it much more universal than it is, it would not supersede the necessity of hearing the word: for there are not only difficulties in