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weight chances, call up me: keep your fellows' counsels and your own, and good night.-Come, neighbour.

2 WATCH. Well, masters, we hear our charge: let us go sit here upon the church-bench till two, and then all to bed.

DOGB. One word more, honest neighbours: I pray you, watch about signior Leonato's door; for the wedding being there to-morrow, there is a great coil to-night: Adieu, be vigilanta, I beseech you.

[Exeunt DOGBERRY and VERGES.

Enter BORACHIO and CONRADE.

BORA. What! Conrade,

WATCH. Peace, stir not.

BORA. Conrade, I say !

[Aside.

CON. Here, man, I am at thy elbow.

BORA. Mass, and my elbow itched; I thought there would a scab follow.

CON. I will owe thee an answer for that; and now forward with thy tale.

BORA. Stand thee close then under this pent-house, for it drizzles rain; and I will, like a true drunkard, utter all to thee.

WATCH. [aside.] Some treason, masters; yet stand close.

BORA. Therefore know, I have earned of don John a thousand ducats.

CON. Is it possible that any villainy should be so dear?

BORA. Thou shouldst rather ask, if it were possible any villainy should be so rich; for when rich villains have need of poor ones, poor ones may make what price they will.

CON. I wonder at it.

BORA. That shows thou art unconfirmed:Thou knowest that the fashion of a doublet, or a hat, or a cloak, is nothing to a man.

CON. Yes, it is apparel.

BORA. I mean, the fashion.

CON. Yes, the fashion is the fashion.

BORA. Tush! I may as well say, the fool 's the fool. But seest thou not what a deformed thief this fashion is ?

WATCH. I know that Deformed; a has been a vile thief this seven year; a goes up and down like a gentleman: I remember his name. BORA. Didst thou not hear somebody?

CON. No; 't was the vane on the house.

BORA. Seest thou not, I say, what a deformed thief this fashion is? how giddily he turns about all the hot bloods, between fourteen and five-and-thirty? sometime, fashioning them like Pharaoh's soldiers in the reechy painting; sometime, like god Bel's priests in the old church-window; sometime, like

Vigilant. Both the quarto and folio have vigitant; but we doubt whether Shakspere meant Dogberry to blunder after this fashion. He does not coin words, like Mrs. Malaprop, in the place of current and familiar ones.

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the shaven Hercules in the smirched a worm-eaten tapestry, where his codpiece seems as massy as his club ?

CON. All this I see; and see that the fashion wears out more apparel than the man: But art not thou thyself giddy with the fashion too, that thou hast shifted out of thy tale into telling me of the fashion?

BORA. Not so neither: but know, that I have to-night wooed Margaret, the lady Hero's gentlewoman, by the name of Hero; she leans me out at her mistress' chamber-window, bids me a thousand times good night,-I tell this tale vilely:-I should first tell thee how the prince, Claudio, and my master, planted, and placed, and possessed by my master don John, saw afar off in the orchard this amiable encounter.

CON. And thought thy Margaret was Hero?

BORA. Two of them did, the prince and Claudio; but the devil my master knew she was Margaret; and partly by his oaths, which first possessed them, partly by the dark night, which did deceive them, but chiefly by my villainy, which did confirm any slander that don John had made, away went Claudio enraged; swore he would meet her as he was appointed, next morning at the temple, and there, before the whole congregation, shame her with what he saw o'er-night, and send her home again without a husband.

1 WATCH. We charge you in the prince's name, stand.

2 WATCH. Call up the right master constable: we have here recovered the most dangerous piece of lechery that ever was known in the commonwealth.

1 WATCH. And one Deformed is one of them; I know him, a wears a lock. CON. Masters, masters.

2 WATCH. You'll be made bring Deformed forth, I warrant you.

CON. Masters,

1 WATCH. Never speak; we charge you, let us obey you to go with us.

BORA. We are like to prove a goodly commodity, being taken up of these men's bills c.

CON. A commodity in question, I warrant you. Come, we 'll obey you.

[Exeunt.

SCENE IV.-A Room in Leonato's House.

Enter HERO, MARGARET, and URSULA.

HERO. Good Ursula, wake my cousin Beatrice, and desire her to rise.
URS. I will, lady.

HERO. And bid her come hither.

URS. Well.

18

MARG. Troth, I think your other rabato were better.

HERO. No, pray thee, good Meg, I'll wear this.

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Smirched-smutched-smudged.

So the folio. In the quarto. "And thought they, Margaret was Hero?"

[Exit URSULA.

Shakspere has here repeated the conceit which we find in 'The Second Part of Henry VI.:'—

"My lord, when shall we go to Cheapside, and take up commodities upon our bills?"

MARG. By my troth, it's not so good; and I warrant your cousin will say so. HERO. My cousin 's a fool, and thou art another; I'll wear none but this. MARG. I like the new tire within excellently, if the hair were a thought browner: and your gown 's a most rare fashion, i' faith. I saw the duchess of Milan's gown, that they praise so.

HERO. O, that exceeds, they say.

MARG. By my troth it 's but a night-gown in respect of yours: Cloth of gold, and cuts, and laced with silver; set with pearls down sleeves, side-sleeves, and skirts, round underborne with a blueish tinsel: but for a fine, quaint, graceful, and excellent fashion, yours is worth ten on 't.

HERO. God give me joy to wear it, for my heart is exceeding heavy!
MARG. T will be heavier soon, by the weight of a man.

HERO. Fie upon thee! art not ashamed?

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MARG. Of what, lady? of speaking honourably? Is not marriage honourable in a beggar? Is not your lord honourable without marriage? I think, you would have me say, saving your reverence," a husband: an bad thinking do not wrest true speaking, I'll offend nobody: Is there any harm in, "the heavier for a husband?" None, I think, an it be the right husband, and the right wife; otherwise 't is light, and not heavy: Ask my lady Beatrice else, here she comes.

Enter BEATRICE.

HERO. Good morrow, coz.

BEAT. Good morrow, sweet Hero.

HERO. Why, how now! do you speak in the sick tune?

BEAT. I am out of all other tune, methinks.

MARG. Clap us into-"Light o' love;

"19 that goes

without a burthen; do you

sing it, and I'll dance it.

BEAT. Yed light o' love, with your heels;-then if your husband have stables enough, you'll look he shall lack no barns.

MARG. O illegitimate construction! I scorn that with my heels.

BEAT. "T is almost five o'clock, cousin; 't is time you were ready. By my

I am exceeding ill: hey ho!

MARG. For a hawk, a horse, or a husband?

The false hair.

troth

This is usually pointed, "set with pearls, down sleeves." The pearls are to be set down the sleeves.

• Side-sleeves-long sleeves-or full sleeves-from the Anglo-Saxon, sid-ample-long. The

66 deep and broad sleeves" of the time of Henry IV. are thus ridiculed by Hoccleve:

"Now hath this land little neede of broomes

To sweepe away the filth out of the streete,

Sen side-sleeves of pennilesse groomes

Will it up licke, be it drie or weete."

d Ye. All the old copies have ye. The modern reading is, "Yea, 'Light o' love,' with your heels." The jest of Beatrice, whatever it be, does not consist in the mere repetition of the name of the tune.

BEAT. For the letter that begins them all, H.

MARG. Well, an you be not turned Turk, there's no more sailing by the star. BEAT. What means the fool, trowb?

MARG. Nothing I; but God send every one their heart's desire!

HERO. These gloves the count sent me, they are an excellent perfume.

BEAT. I am stuffed, cousin, I cannot smell.

MARG. A maid, and stuffed! there 's goodly catching of cold.

BEAT. O, God help me! God help me! how long have you professed apprehension?

MARG. Ever since you left it: doth not my wit become me rarely?

BEAT. It is not seen enough, you should wear it in your cap.-By my troth, I am sick.

MARG. Get you some of this distilled Carduus Benedictus 20, and lay it to your heart; it is the only thing for a qualm.

HERO. There thou prick'st her with a thistle.

BEAT. Benedictus! why Benedictus? you have some moral in this Benedictus. MARG. Moral! no, by my troth, I have no moral meaning; I meant, plain holythistle. You may think, perchance, that I think you are in love: nay, by 'r lady, I am not such a fool to think what I list; nor I list not to think what I can; nor, indeed, I cannot think, if I would think my heart out of thinking, that you are in love, or that you will be in love, or that you can be in love: yet Benedick was such another, and now is he become a man: he swore he would never marry; and yet now, in despite of his heart, he eats his meat without grudging: and how you may be converted, I know not; but, methinks, you look with your eyes as other women do.

BEAT. What pace is this that thy tongue keeps?

MARG. Not a false gallop.

Re-enter URSULA.

URS. Madam, withdraw; the prince, the count, signior Benedick, don John, and

all the gallants of the town, are come to fetch you to church.

HERO. Help to dress me, good coz, good Meg, good Ursula.

[Exeunt.

• An epigram by Heywood, 1566, explains this jest; and gives us the old pronunciation of ache, to which John Kemble adhered in despite of "the groundlings:"

"H is amongst worse letters in the cross-row;

For if thou find him either in thine elbow,

In thine arm, or leg, in any degree;

In thine head, or teeth, or toe, or knee;

Into what place soever H may pike him,

Wherever thou find ache thou shalt not like him."

A friend has pointed out that even in the time of Sir Richard Blackmore, aches was pronounced as a dissyllable:

"Cripples, with aches and with age opprest,

Crawl on their crutches to the grave for rest.”

Trow-I trow. So in 'The Merry Wives of Windsor:'-"Who's there, trow?"

SCENE V.-Another Room in Leonato's House.

Enter LEONATO, with DOGBERRY and VERGES.

LEON. What would you with me, honest neighbour?

DOGB. Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you that decerns you nearly.

LEON. Brief, I pray you; for, you see, it is a busy time with me.

DOGB. Marry, this it is, sir.

VERG. Yes, in truth it is, sir.

LEON. What is it, my good friends?

DOGB. Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the matter: an old man, sir, and his wits are not so blunt, as, God help, I would desire they were; but, in faith, honest, as the skin between his brows.

VERG. Yes, I thank God, I am as honest as any man living, that is an old man, and no honester than I.

DOGB. Comparisons are odorous: palabras, neighbour Verges.

LEON. Neighbours, you are tedious.

DOGB. It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the poor duke's officers; but, truly, for mine own part, if I were as tedious as a king I could find in my heart to bestow it all of your worship.

LEON. All thy tediousness on me! ha!

DOGB. Yea, and 't were a thousand times a more than 't is : for I hear as good exclamation on your worship, as of any man in the city; and though I be but a poor man I am glad to hear it.

VERG. And so am I.

LEON. I would fain know what you have to say.

VERG. Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your worship's presence, have ta'en a couple of as arrant knaves as any in Messina.

DOGB. A good old man, sir; he will be talking; as they say, When the age is in, the wit is out; God help us! it is a world to see!-Well said, i' faith, neighbour Verges :-well, God 's a good man; an two men ride of a horse, one must ride behind :-An honest soul, i' faith, sir; by my troth he is, as ever broke bread: but God is to be worshipped: All men are not alike; alas, good neighbour !

LEON. Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.

DOGB. Gifts, that God gives.

LEON. I must leave you.

DOGB. One word, sir: our watch, sir, have, indeed, comprehended two aspicious persons, and we would have them this morning examined before your worship.

LEON. Take their examination yourself, and bring it me; I am now in great haste, as may appear unto you.

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