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Pist. How dow, Mephostophilus?
Eva. But that is not the question ; the question is
concerning your marriage.
Eva. Marry, is it; the very point of it; to mis-
Slen. Why, if it be so, I will marry her, upon any Eva. Peace, I pray yor! Now let us understand reasonable demands. there is three umpires in this matter, as I understand : Era. B t can you affection the 'oman? Let us comthat is,--master Page, fidelicet, master Page ; and mand to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; there is myself, fidelicet, myself'; and the three party for divers philosophers hold, that the lips is parcel of is, lastly and finally, mine host of the Garter. the mouth ;--thereio e, precisely, can you carry your
Page: We three, to hear it, and end it between good will to the maid? them.
Shal. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love her! Eva. Ferry goot: I will make a prief of it in my Slen. I hope, sir, I will do, as it shall become note-book; and we will afterwards 'ork upon the one that would do reason. cause, with as great discreetly as we can.
Era. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must Fal. Pistol, -
speak possitable, if you can carry her your desires toPist. He hears with ears.
wards her. Era. The tevil and his tam ! what phrase is this, Shal. That you must: will you, upon good dowry, He hears rrith ear? Why, it is affectations.
marry her! Fal. Pistol, did you pick master Slender's purse? Slen. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your Slen. Ay, by these gloves did he (or I would request, cousin, in any reason. might never come in mine own great chamber again Shal. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz; else), of seven groats in mill-sixpences, and two what I do, is to pleasure you, coz: Can you love the Edward shovel-boards, that cost me two shilling and maid? two-pence a piece of Yead Miller, by these gloves. Slen. I will marry her, sir, at your request; but if Fal. Is this true, Pistol !
there be no great love in the beginning, yet heaven Eva. No ; it is false, if it is a pick-purse. may decrease it upon better acquaintance, when we are Pist. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner !--sir John, and married, and bave more occasion to know one anomaster mine,
ther: I hope, upon familiarity will grow more conI combat challenge of this latten bilbo :
tempt : but if you say, marry her, I will marry her, Word of denial in thy labras here;
that I am freely dissolved, and dissolutely. Word of denial; froth and scum, thou liest.
Eva. It is a fery discretion ansiver ; save, the faul' Sien. By these gloves, then 'twas he,
is in the 'ort dissolutely : the 'ort is, according to our Nym. Be advisd, sir, and pass good humours: 1 meaning, resolutely ;- his meaning is good. will say, marry trap, with you, if you run the nu- Shal. Ay, I think my cousin meant well. hook's humour on me, that is the very note of it. Slen. Ay, or else I would I might be hang'd, la.
Slen. By this hat, then be in the red face had it : for though I cannot remember what I did when you
Re-enter Anne Page. made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass. Skal. Here comes fair mistress Anne :--Wonld I Fal. Wbat say you, Scarlet and John!
were young, for your sake, mistress Anne ! Bard. Why, sir, for my part, I say, the gentleman Anne. The dinner is on the table ; my father dehad drunk himself out of his five sentences.
sires your worships' company: Eva. It is his five senses : fie, what the ignorance
Shal. I will wait on him, fair mistress Anne. is !
Eva. Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at Bard. And being fap, sir, was, as they say, ca- the grace, [ Exeunt Shallow and Sir H. Evans. shier'd ; and so conclusions pass'd the careires. Anne. Will't please your worship to come in, sir?
Slen. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no Slen. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am matter : I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but very well. in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I Anne. The dinner attends you, sir. be drank, I'll be drunk with those that bave the Slen. I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth: fear of God, and not with drunken knaves.
Go, sirrah, for all you are iny man, go, wait upon my Eva. So Got 'udge me, that is a virtuous mind. cousin Shallow : Exit Simple) A justice of peace
Fal. You hear all these matters denied, gentlemen; sometime may be beholden to his friend for a man : you hear it.
-I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother Enter Mistress Anne Page, with Wine ; Mistress
be dead: but what though! yet I live like a poor Ford and Mistress Page following.
Anne. I may not go in without your worship : they drink within.
[Exit Anne Page. Slen. O heaven ! this is mistress Anne Page.
Sien. l'faith, I'll eat nothing ; I thank you as much Page. How now, mistress Ford !
as though I did. Pal. Mistress Ford, by my troth, you are very well
Anne. I pray you, sir, walk in. met: by your leave, good mistress.
Slen. I had rather walk here, I thank you : I
[Kissing her. Page: Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome : -- Come, and dagger with a master of fence, three veneys for
bruised my shin the other day with playing at sword we have a hot venison pasty to dinner; come, gen- a dish ot" stewed prunes; and, by my troth, I cannot tlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness. abide the smell of bot 'meat sinceWhy do your
(Exeunt all but Shal. Slender, and Evans, dogs bark so? be there bears i'the town?
Anne. I think there are, sir ; I heard them talked
Slen. I love the sport well ; but I shall as soon
Anne. Ay, indeed, sir.
him by the chain : but, I warrant you, the women
Re-enter Page. be so, I shall do that that is reason.
Page. Come, gentle master Slender, come ; we Shal. Nay, but iwderstand me.
stay for you. Slen. So I do, sir.
Slen. I'll eat nothing; I thank you, sir.
Slen. Nay, pray you, lead the way.
Anne. Not I, sir; pray you, keep on.
Slen. Truly, I will not go first; truly, la : I will
Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with not do you that wrong:
such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye Anne. I pray you, sir.
did seemt scorch me up like a burning-glass ! Here's Slen. I'll rather be unmannerly than troublesome : another letter to her: she bears the purse too: she is you do yourself wrong, indeed, la. (Exeunt. a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be
cheater to them both, and they shall be exchequers to SCENE II. The same.
me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I Enter Sir Hugh Evans and simple.
will trade to them both. Go, bear thou this letter to Eva. Go your ways, and ask of doctor Caius' house, mistress Page ; and thou this to mistress Ford: we which is the way and there dweils one mistress
will thrive, lads, we will thrive.
Pist. Shall I sir Pandarus of Troy become, Quickly, which is in the manner of his narse, or his
And by my side wear s'eel? then, Lucifer take all ! dry nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and his wringer.
Nym. I will run no base bumour; here, take the
; Sim. Well, sir.
humour letter; I will keep the 'haviour of reputa
tion. Eva. Nay, it is petter yet: give her this letter ; for it is a 'oman that altogether's acquaintance with
Fal. Hold, sirrah, [To Rob.] bear you these letters mistress Anne Page ; and the letter is, to desire and Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.
tightly; require her to solicit your master's desires to mistress Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hail-stones, go ;, Anne Page : I pray you, be gone; I will make an Trudge, plod, away, o'the hoof; seek shelter, pack'! end of my dinner: there's pippins and cheese to Falstaff will learn the humour of this age,
[Exeunt. French thrift, you rogues ; myself, and skirted page. SCENE III. A Room in the Garter Inn.
[Exeunt Falstaff and Robin.
Pist. Let vultures gripe thy guts ! for gourd and Enter Falstaff, Host, Bardolph, Nym, Pistol, and
fullam holds, Robin.
And high and low beguile the rich and poor : Pal. Mine host of the Garter,
Tester I'll have in pouch, when thou shalt lack, Host. What says my bully-rook ? Speak scholarly, Base Phrygian Turk ! and wisely.
Nym. I have operations in my head, which be huFal. Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of mours of revenge. my followers.
Pist. Wilt thou revenge ! Fost. Discard, bully Hereules; cashier : let them Nym.
By welkin, and her star! wag ; trot, trot.
Pist. With wit, or steel? Fal. I sit at ten pounds a week.
With both the humours, I; Host. Thou’rt an emperor, Cæsar, Keisar, and I will discuss the humor of this love to Page. Pheezar. I will entertain Bardolph; he shall draw,
Pist. And I to Ford shall eke unfold, he shall tap : said I well, bully Hector ?
How Falstaff, varlet vile, Fal. Do so, good mine host.
His dove will prove, his gold will hold, Host. I bave spoke; let him follow : let me see
And his soft couch defile. thee, froth and lime : I am at a word ; follow. [Exit. Nym. My humour shall not cool : I will incense
Fal. Bardolph, follow him ; a tapster is a good Page to deal with poison ; I will possess him with trade : an old cloak makes a new
jerkin ; a withered yellowness, for the revolt of mien is dangerous : that serving-man, a fresh tapster : go; adieu.
is my true humour. Bard. It is a life that I have desired; I will thrive. Pist. Thou art the Mars of malcontents : I second [Exit. thee; troop on.
[Exeunt. Pist. O hase Gongarian wight! wilt thou the spigot wield?
SCENE IV. A Room in Dr. Caius's House. Nym. He was gotten in drink : is not the humoar conceited ? His mind is not heroic, and there's the
Enter Mrs. Quickly, Simple, and Rugby. humour of it.
Quick. What; John Rugby!--I pray thee, go to Pal. I am glad, I am so acquit of this tinder-box; the casement, and see if you
can see my master, mashis thefts were too open : his filching was like an ter doctor Caius, coming: if he do, i'faith, and find unskilful singer, he kept not time. Nym. The good humour is, to steal at a minute's any body in the house, here will be an old abusing
God's patience, and the king's English. rest.
Rug. I'll go watch.
(Exit. Pist. Convey, the wise it oall: steal ! foh; a fico Quick. Go ; and we'll have a posset for't soon at for the phrase!
night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. Fal. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels.
An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall Pist. Why then let kibes ensue.
come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no tellPal. There is no remedy; I must coney-catch; I tale, nor no breed-bate his worst fault is, that he is must shift.
given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: Pist. Young ravens must have food.
but nobody but has his fault ;-but let that pass. Fal. Which of yon know Ford of this town!
Peter Sinple, you say your name is! Pist. I ken the wight; he is of substance good.
Sim. Ay, for fault of a better. Fal. My honest lads, I will tell yon what I am Quick. And master Slender's your master ? about.
Sim. Ay, forsooth. Pist. Two yards, and more.
Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, like Fal. No quips now, Pistol ; indeed I am in the
a glover's paring-knife ? waist two yards abont: but I am now about no waste; Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love with a little yellow beard ; a cane-coloured beard. to Ford's wife; I spy entertainment in her ; she
Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not ! discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invita- Sim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his tion : I can construe the action of her familiar style ; hands, as any is between this and his head; he hath and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be Eng-fought with a warrener. lish'd rightly, is, I am sir John Falstaff's.
Quick. How say you !--0, I shonld remember him; Pist. He huth studied her well, and translated her does he not hold up his head, as it were i and strut well : out of honesty into English.
in his gait! Nym. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass! S'm. Yes, indeed, does he.
Fal. Now, the report goes, she has all the rule of Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse her husband's purse; she hath legions of angels. fortune! Tell master parson Evans, I will do what I Pist. As many devils entertain ; and, To her boy, can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I
wish Nym. 'The humour rises ; it is good: humour me the angels.
Re-enter Rugby. Fal. I have writ me here a letter to ber : and here Rug. Out, alas ! here comes my master. another to Page's wife; who even now gave me good Quick. We shall all be shent: run in here, good eyes too, examind my parts with most judicious ey- young man ; go into this closet. (Shuts Simple in the líads : sometimes the beam of her view gilded iny Closet} He will not stay long.- What, Joho Rugby! foot, sometimes my portly belly.
John, what, John, I say !-Go, John, go inquire for Pist. Then did the sun on dunghill shine.
my master: I doubt, be be not well, that he comes not Nym. I thank thee for that bumour.
home :--and down, doron, adoun-a, &c. (Singe.
Enter Doctor Caius.
Quick. The better, that it pleases your good worCaius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys ; ship to ask. Pray you, go and vetch
me in my closet un boitier Fent. What news ? how does pretty mistress Anne! verd ; a box, a green-a box; do intend vat I speak ? Quick. In truth, sir, and she is pretty, and honest, a green-a box.
and gentle ; and one that is your friend, I can tell you Quick. Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you. I am glad that by the way, I praise heaven for it. he went not in himself; if he had found the young Fent. Shall I do any good, thinkest thou ? Shall I man, he would have been born-mad. [Aside not lose my suit! Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fel ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je
Quick. Troth, sir, all is in his hands above : but m'en vais a la cour, -la grande affaire.
notwithstanding, master Fenton, I'll be sworn on a Quick. Is it this, sir?
book, she loves you :-Have not your worship a wart Caius. Ouy; mette le au mon pocket; depeche, above your eye? quickly :-Vere is dat knave Rugby?
Fent. Yes, marry, have I ; what of that? Quick. What, John Rugby? John!
Quick. Well, thereby hangs a tale ;-good faith, Rug. Here, sir.
it is such another Nan - but, I detest, an honest maid Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack as ever broke bread :-We had an hour's talk of that Rugby : come, take-a your rapier, and come after my wart ;--I shall never laugh but in that maid's comheel to de court.
pany.--But, indeed, she is given too much to alliRug. "Tis ready, sir, here in the porch.
choly and musing : but for you-Well, go to. Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long :-od's me! Fent. Well, I shall see her to-day: hold, there's Qu'ay j'oublie ? dere is some simples in my closet, dat money for thee ; let me have thy voice in my behalf : I will not for the varld I shall leave behind.
if thou seest her before me, commend me Quick. Ah me! he'll find the young man there, and Quick. Will, I? i'faith, that we will : and I will be mad.
tell your worship more of the wart, the next time we Caius. O diable, diable ! vat is in my closet !- Vil have confidence; and of other wooers. lany! larron! (Pulling Simple out] Rugby, my ra- Fent. Well, farewell ; I am in great haste now. pier.
[Exit. Quick. Good master, be content.
Quick. Farewell to your worship.-Traly, an hoCaius. Verefore shall I be content-a?
nest gentleman; but Anne loves him not; for I Quick. The young man is an honest man.
know Anne's mind as well as another does :-Out Caius. Vat shall de honest man do in my closet ? upon't! what have I forgot?
[Exit. dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet.
Quick. I beseech yon, be not so flegmatic; hear the truth of it: he came of an errand to me from parson
SCENE I. Before Page's House.
Enter Mistress Page, with a Letter. Quick, Peace, I pray you.
Mrs. Page. What! have I 'scaped love-letters in Caius. Peace-a your tongue :--Speak-a your tale. the holy-day time of my beauty, and am I now a Sim. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your subject for them ? Let me see :
[Reads. maid, to speak a good word to mistress Aune Page, for my master, in the way of marriage.
Ask me no reason why I love you; for though love Quick. This is all, indeed, la ; but I'll ne'er pat his counsellor : You are not young, no more am I;
use reason for his precisian, he admits him not for my finger in the fire, and need not. Caius. Sir Hugh send-a you ?--Ragby, bailles me 1; ha! ha! then there's more sympathy: you love
go to then, there's sympathy: you are merry, 80 am some paper :- Tarry you a little-a while. [ Writes. Sack, and 80 do 1; world Quick. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been thy? Let it suffice thee, mistress Page (at the least,
you desire better sympathoroughly moved, you should have heard him so if the love of a soldier can suffice), that I love thee loud, and so melancholy;--but notwithstanding, man, I will not say, pity me, 'tis not a soldier-like phrase ; I'll do your master what good I can and
the very but I say, love me. By me, yea and the no is, the French doctor, my master,-1
Thine oun true knight, may call him my master, look you, for I keep his house;
By day or night, and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drivk, make the beds, and do all myself;-
Or any kind of light,
With all his might, Sim. 'Tis a great charge, to come ander one body's hand.
For thee to fight,
John Falstaff. Quick. Are you avis'd o'that? you shall find it a great charge : and to be up early, and down late world !--one that is well nigh worn to pieces with
What a Herod of Jewry is this !-- wicked, wicked but notwithstanding (to tell you in your ear; I would have no words of it ;) my master himself is in love age, to show himself a young
gallant! What an unwith mistress Anne Page but notwithstanding that,ed (with the devil's name) out of my conversation,
weighed behaviour hath this Flemish drunkard pickI know Anne's mind,
that's neither here nor there. Caius. You jack'nape; give-a dis letter to sir
that he dares in this manner assay me! Why, he Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge : I vill cut his troat
hath not been thrice in my company !-What should in de park, and I vill teaeli a scursy jack-a-nape heaven forgive me -Why, I'll exhibit a bill in the
I say to him ?-I was then frugal of my mirth :priest to meddle or make :---you may be gone; it is not good you tarry here :--by gar, i vill out all his parliament for the putting down of men. How shall two stones; by går, he shall not have a stone to i be revenged on him ?°for revenged I will be, as trow at his dog.
(Exit Simple. sure as his gats are made of puddings. Quick. Alas, he speaks but for his friend.
Enter Mistress Ford. Caius. It is no matter-a for dat :-do not you tell-a Mrs. Ford. Mistress Page ! trust me, I was going me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself!--by gar, to your house. I vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine Mrs. Page. And, trust me, I was coming to you. host of de Jarterre to measure our weapon :--by gar, You look very ill. I vill myself bave Anne Page.
Mrs. Ford. Nay, I'll ne'er believe that; I have to Quick. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be show to the contrary. well: we must give folks leave to prate : What the Mrs. Page. 'Faith, but you do, in my mind. good-jer!
Mrs. Ford. Well, I do then; yet I say, I could
I Caius. Rugby, come to de court vit me ;-by gar, show you to the contrary : 0, mistress Page, give me if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out some counsel! of my door :-Follow my heels, Rugby
Mrs. Page. What's the matter, woman? [ Exeunt Caius and Rugby. Mrs. Ford. O woman, if it were not for one triQuick. You shall have An fool's-head of your own. fling respect, I could come to such honour ! No, I know Anne's mind for that: never
Mrs. Page. Mang the trifle, woman; take the hoin Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I do; nour: what is it?-dispense with ifles ;-what is nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heavenit! Fent. [Within) Who's within there, ho?
Mrs. Ford. If I would but go to hell for an eterQuick. Who's there, I trow ! Come near the house, nal moment, or so, I could be knighted. I pray you.
Mrs. Page. What ?-thou liest!--Sir Alice Ford ! Enter Fenton.
-These knights will hack; and so thou shouldst Pent. How now, good woman; how dost thou ? not alter the article of thy gentry.
Mrs. Ford. We burn day-light:-here, read, read; Page. I will not believe such a Cataian, though the -perceive how I might be knighted. I shall think priest o'the town cominended him for a true man. the worse of fat men, as long as I bave an eye to Ford. 'Twas a good sensible fellow : Well. make difference of men's liking: and yet he would Page. How now, Meg? not swear ; praised women's modesty: and gave Mrs. Page. Whither go you, George !-Hark you. such orderly and well-behaved reproof to all an- Mrs. Ford. How now, sweet Frank ! why art thou comeliness, that I would have sworn his disposition melancholy ! would have gone to the truth of his words : but they Ford. I melancholy! I am not melancholy.-Get do no more adhere and keep place together, than the you home, go. hundredth psalm to the tune of Green slecves. What Mrs. Ford. 'Faith, thou hast some crotchets in thy tempest, I trow, threw this whale, with so many tans head now.-Will you go, inistress Page ! of oil in his belly, ashore at Windsor ! How shall I Mrs. Page. Have with you.-You'll come to dinner, be revenged on him! I think the best way were to George 1-Look, who comes yonder: she shall be our entertain him with hope, till the wicked tire of lust messenger to this paltry knight. have melted him in his own grease. -Did you ever
[ Aside to Mrs. Ford. hear the like!
Enter Mistress Quickly.
Mrs. Ford. Trust me, I thought on her : she'll fit it. mystery of ill opinions, here's the twin-brother of thy
Mrs. Page. You are come to see my daughter Anne. letter but let thine inherit first : for, I protest, mine
Quick. Ay, forsooth; And, I pray, how does good never shall. I warrant, he hath a thousand of these
mistress Anne? letters, writ with blank space for different names
Mrs. Page. Co in with us, and see ; we have an (sare more), and these are of the second edition : he hour's talk with you. will print them out of doubt : for he cures not what | Exeunt Mrs. Page, Mrs. Ford, and Mrs. Quickly. he pnts into the press, when he would put us two.
Page. How now, inaster Ford ?
Ford. You heard what this knave told me; did you I had rather be a giantess, a d lie under mount Pe
not? lion. Well, I will find you twenty lascivious turtles, ere one chaste man.
Page. Yes; and you heard what the other told me !
Ford. Do you think there is truth in them? Mrs. Ford. Why, this is the very same; the very hand, the very words : what doth he think of us !
Page. Hang 'em, slaves ! I do not think the knight Mrs. Page. Nay, I know not : it nakes me almost would offer it': but these that accuse him in his inready to wrangle with mine own honesty. I'll en tent towards our wives, are a yoke of his discarded tertain myself like one that I am not acquainted men; very rogues, now they be out of service. withal; for, sure, unless he know some strain in me,
Ford, Were they his inen? that I know not myself, he would never have board
Page. Marry, were they. ed me in this fury.
Ford. I like it never the better for that Does he Mrs. Ford. Boarding, call you it? I'll be sure to lie at the Garter? keep him above deok.
Page. Ay, marry, does he. If he shonld intend Mrs. Page. So will I; if he come under my
this voyage towards my wife, I would turn her loose hatches, l'il never to sea again. Let's be revenged to him; and what he gets more of her than sharp on him: let's appoint him a ineeting; give him a show words let it lie on my lead. of comfort in his suit; and lead hiin on with a tine-loath to turn them together. A man may be too confi
Ford. I do not misdoubt my wife ; but I would be bated delay, till he hath pawn'd his horses to mine dent: I would have nothing lie on my head : I canhost of the Garter.
Mrs. Ford. Nay, I will consent to act any villany not be thus satisfied. against him, that may not sully the chariness of our
Page. Look, where my ranting host of the Garter honesty. o, that my husband saw this letter! it comes : there is either liquor in his pate, or inoney in would give eternal food to his jealousy.
bis purse, when he looks so merrily.--How now, Mrs. Page. Why, look, where he comes ; and my mine host ? good man too: he's as far from jealousy, as I am from
Enter Host and Shallow. giving him cause ; and that, I hope, is an unmea- Host. How now, bully-rook ? thou’rt a gentleman : surable distance.
cavalero.justice, I say. Mrs. Ford. You are the happier woman.
Shal. I follow, mine host, I follow.--Good even, Mrs. Page. Let's consult together against this and twenty, good master Page ! Master Page, will greasy knight: come hither.
(They retire. you go with us! we have sport in hand. Bnter Ford, Pistol, Page, and Nym.
Host. Tell him, cavalero-justice; tell him, bullyFord. Well, I hope, it be not be so.
Shal. Sir, there is a fray to be fought, between sir Pist. Hope is a curtail dog in some affairs : Hugh the Welsh priest, and Caias the French doctor. Sir John affects thy wife.
Ford. Good mine host o'the Garter, a word with Ford. Why, sir, my wife is not young. [poor, you
Pist. He wooes both high and low, both rich and Host. What say'st thoa, bally-rook! Both young and old, one with another, Ford ;
[They go aside. He loves thy gally-mawfry; Ford, perpend. i
Shal. Will you (To Page) go with us to behold it? Ford. Love my wife ?
my merry host hath had the measuring of their weaPist. With liver burning hot : prevent, or go thou, pons ? and, I think, he bath appointed them contrary Like sir Actæon he, with Ring-wood at thy heels: places : for, believe me, I hear, the parson is no o, odious is the name !
jester. Hark, I will tell you what our sport shall be. Ford. What name, sir !
Host. Hast thou no suit against my knight, my Pist. The horn, I say : farewell. Enight : guest-cavalier! Take heed; have open eye ; for thieves do foot by Ford. None, I protest: but I'll give you a pottle of Take heed, ere summer comes, or cuckoo-birds do burnt sack to give me recourse to him, and tell him, Away, sir corporal Nym.
[sing.- my name is Brook only for a jest, Believe it, Page ; he speaks sense. (Exit. Host. My hand, bully: thou shalt have egress and
Ford. I will be patient; I will find out this. regress; said I well! and thy name shall be Brook :
Nym. And this is true ; [To Page) I like not the It is a verry knight.--Will you go on, hearts ! humour of lying. He hath wroug'd me in some bu
Shal. Have with you, mine host. mours; I should have borne the humoured letter to Page. I have heard, the Frenchman hath good skill her : but I have a sword, and it shall bite upon my in bis rapier. necessity. He loves your wife ; there's the short and Shal. Tut, sir, I cou'd have told you more : In the long. My name is corporal Nym; I speak, and these times you stand on distance, your passes, stocI avouch. "Tis true :- my name is Nym, and Falstaff cadoes, and I know not what: 'tis the heart, master loves your wife. --Adieu i I love not the humoar of Page ; 'tis bere, 'tis here. I have seen the time, bread and cheese ; and there's the humour of it. with my long sword, I would have made you four Adieu.
(Exit.tall fellows skip tike rats. Page. The humour of it, qaoth 'a! here's a fellow Host. Here, boys, here, here I shall we wag? frights humour out of his wits.
Page. Have with you bad rather hear them Ford. I will seek out Falstaff.
scola than fight. (Exeunt Host, Shallow, an i Page. Page. I never heard such a drawling, affecting Fort. Though Page be a secure fool, and stands so rogue.
firmly on his wife's trai'ty, yet I cannot put off my Ford. If I do find it, well.
opinion so easily : She was in his company at Page's
house; and, what they made there, I know not. Fal. But what says she to me? be brief, my good Well, I will look further into't: and I have a dis- she Mercury. guise to sound Falstaff: if I find her honest, I lose Quick. Marry, she hath received your letter; for not my labour : if she be otherwise, 'tis labour well the which she thanks you a thousand times; and she bestowed.
(Exit. gives you to notify, that her husband will be absence
from his house between ten and eleven. SCENE II. A Room in the Garter Inn.
Fal. Ten and eleven!
Quick. Ay, forsooth; and then you may come and Enter Falstaff and Pistol.
see the picture, she says, that you wot of;-master Pal. I will not lend thee a penny.
Ford, her husband, will be from home. Alas! the Pist. Why, then the world's mine oyster.
sweet woman leads an ill life with him; he's a very Which I with sword will open.
jealousy man; she leads a very frampold life with I will retort the sum in equipage.
him, good heart. Pal. Not a penny. I have been content, sir, you Fal. Ten and eleven : Woman, commend me to should lay my countenance to pawn: I have grated her ; I will not fail her. upon my good friends for three reprieves for you and Quick. Why, you say well! But I have another your coach-fellow, Nym; or else you had looked messenger to your worship : Mistress Page bath her through the grate like a geminy of baboons. I am hearty commendations to you too ;--and let me tell damned in hell, for swearing to gentlemen, my friends, you in your ear, she's as fartuous a civil modest wife, you were good soldiers, and tall fellows: and when and one (I tell you that will not miss your morning mistress Bridget lost the handle of her fan, I took't nor evening prayer, as any is in Windsor, whoe'er upon mine honour, thou hadst it not.
be the other and she bade me tell your worship, Pist. Didst thou not share? hadst thou not fifteen- that her husband is seldom from home ; but, she
hopes, there will come a time. I never knew a woFal. Reason, yoa rogue, reason. Think'st thou, man so dote upon a man : surely, I think you have I'll endanger my soul gratis ? At a word, hang no charms, la ; yes, in truth. more about me, I am no gibbet for you :--50.--A Fal. Not I, I assure thee; setting the attraction of short knife and a throng :--to your manor of Pickt. my good parts aside, I bave no other charms. hatch, go. --You'll not bear a letter for me, you Quick. Blessing on your heart fort ! rogue - you stand upon your honour !-Why, thou Ful. But, I pray thee, tell me this has Ford's unconfinable baseness, it is as much as I can do, to wife, and Page's wife, acquainted each other how keep the terms of my honour precise. I, I, I myself they love me? sometimes, leaving the fear of heaven on the left Quick. That were a jest indeed !--they have not so hand, and hiding mine honoar in my necessity, am little grace, I hope : --that were a trick, indeed! But fain to shuffle, to hedge, and to lurch ; and yet you, mistress Page would desire you to send ber your little rogue, will ensconce your rags, your cat-a-mountain page, of all loves ; her husband has a marvellous inlooks, your red-lattice phrases, and your bold-beating fection to the little page : and, truly, master Page is oaths, under the shelter of your honour! You will an honest man. Never a wife in Windsor leads a not do it, you !
better life than she does; do what she will, say Pist. I do relent; What wouldst thou more of man? what she will, take all, pay all, go to bed when Enter Robin.
she list, rise when she list, all is as she will; and
truly she deserves it : for if there be a kind woman Rob. Sir, here's a woman would speak with you. in Windsor, she is one. You must send her your Fal. Let her approach.
page ; no remedy. Enter Mistress Quickly.
Fal. Why, I will.
Quick. Nay, but do so then : and, look you, he Quick. Give your worship good morrow.
may come and go between you both; and, in any case, Hal. Good morrow, good wife.
have a nay-word, that you may know one another's Quick. Not so, an't please your worship.
mind, and the boy never need to understand any Pal. Good maid, then.
thing; for 'tis not good that children should know Quick. I'll be sworn; as my mother was, the first any wickedness: old folks, you know, have discrehonr I was born.
tion, as they say, and know the world. Fal. I do believe the swearer: What with me! Fal. Fare thee well : commend me to them both : Quick. Shall I vouchsafe your worship a word or there's my purse: I am yet thy debtor.---Boy, go two?
along with this woman.-'This news distracts me! Fal. Two thousand, fair woman; and I'll vouch
[Exeunt Quickly and Robin. safe thee the hearing.
Pist. This punk is one of Cupid's carriers :Quick. There is one mistress Ford, sir ;--I pray, Clap on more sails ; pursue, np with your fights;
i come a little nearer this ways :-I myself dwell with Give fire ; she is my prize, or ocean whelm them all! master doctor Caius.
[Exit. Fal. Well, on: Mistress Ford, you say,
Fal. Say'st thou so, old Jack ! go thy ways; I'll Quick. Your worship says very true : 1 pray your make more of thy old body than I have done. Will worship, come a little nearer this ways.
they yet look after thee? Wilt thou, after the ex. Fal.' I warrant thee nobody hears ;-mine own pense of so much money, be now a gainer! Good people, mine own people.
body, I thank thee : Let them say, 'tis grossly done ; Quick. Are they so? Heaven bless them, and make so it be fairly done, no matter. them his servants ! Fal. Well : mistress Ford ;--what of her ?
Enter Bardolph. Quick. Why, sir, she's a good creature. Lord, Bard. Sir John, there's one master Brook below lord! your worship's a wantou: Well, heaven for-would fain speak with you, and be acquainted with give you, and all of us, I pray !
you; and hath sent your worship a morning's draught Fal. Mistress Ford --come, mistress Ford.
of sack. Quick. Marry, this is the short and the long of it; Pal. Brook, his name? you have brought her into such a canaries, as 'tis Bard. Ay, sir. wonderful. The best courtier of them all, when the Fal. Call him in ; [Exit Bardolph] Such Brooks court lay at Windsor, could never have brought her are welcome to me, that overtlow such liquor. Ah ! lords, gentlemen, to for such a canary. Yet there, has been knights, and ha! mistress Ford and mistress Page, have 1 enyou, coach after coach, letter after letter, gift after gift; smelling so sweetly (all musk,) and so rushling,
Re-enter Bardolph, with Ford disguised. warrant you, in silk and gold; and in such ahli- Ford. Bless you, sir. gant terms; and in such wine and sugar of the best, Fal. And you sir : would you speak with me! and the fairest, that would have won any woman's Pord. I make bold, to press with so little prepaheart; and, I warrant you, they could never get an ration upon you. eye-wink of her.-I had myself twenty angels given Fal. You're welcome ; what's your will ? Give us me this morning : but I defy all angels (in any such leave, drawer.
[Exit Bardolph. sort, as they say), but in the way of honesty-and, Ford. Sir, I am a gentleman that have spent much ; I warrant you, they could never get her so much as my name is Brook. sip on a cup with the proudest of them all: and yet Fal. Good master Brook, I desire more acquaintthere has been earls, nay, which is more, pensioners ; ance of you. bot, I warrant you, all is one with her.
Ford. Good sir John, I sue for yours : not to charge