« ZurückWeiter »
any thing to be done in commemoration of him, “ Yes," he replied, “let the boys be allowed to play on the anniversary of my death.'
Honour. - Conventional legislation for the correction and government of all those points which the law does not reach.
Hope. -A compensation for the realities of life, most enjoyed by those who have the least to lose, since they are generally rendered much happier by expectation than they would be by possession.
Hunger.—The universal stimulant of men and beasts : the same which gives the poor man his health and his appetite ; the want of which afflicts the rich with disease and satiety.
Hypochondria.—The imaginary malady with which those are taxed who have no real one.
Idol.—What many worship in their own shape who would be shocked at doing it in any other.
Jealousy.-Tormenting yourself for fear you should be tormented by another.
Illuminati.-Men enlightened by nature, and of course particularly obnoxious to the hooded owls royal bats, and chartered beasts of prey, who thrive best in the deepest darkness.
İmmortality-of modern authors. - Drawing in imagination upon the future for that homage which the present age refuses to pay. At best a protracted oblivion.
Indigestion, Industry. Two words which were never before found united.
Infant.-A mysterious meteor sent to us from the invisible world, into which, after performing the evolutions incidental to the seven ages of man, it will finally return.
Ink. The liquid which renders thought visible and reason communicable: and of course the greatest enemy to the
Inquisition.--For which see Holy Alliance.
Judge, Jury.—A compound legal machine, somewhat resembling a clock,—the latter exhibiting twelve numbers, and giving warning to the former, before he can strike, or indicate the hour at which a criminal is to die.
Ivy.A vegetable corruptionist, which, for the purpose of its own support, attaches itself with the greatest tenacity to that which is the most antiquated and untenable, and the fullest of holes, flaws, and imperfections.
King.–According to modern doctrine, the hereditary proprietor of a nation ; according to reason, its accountable first magistrate.
Kitchen.—The temple for whose consumption hecatombs of animals are daily sacrificed, who, however, generally wreak a final revenge upon epicures and gluttons.
Knowledge.--A molebill removed from the mountain of our ignorance.
Laughter. A faculty bestowed exclusively upon man, and which there is therefore a sort of impiety in not exercising as frequently as
We may say with Titus, that we have lost a day if it have passed without our laughing. The pilgrims at Mecca consider it so essential a part of their devotion, that they call upon the Prophet to preserve them from sad faces. VOL. XI, NO, XLVIII.
Lark. The matin chorister, that first sets the light of heaven to music.
Law.—That in which we are still as far behind some portions of Europe as we are ahead of them in cottons and cutlery, owing principally to the blind obstinacy of its professors, who have in all ages been the last to abandon a legal abuse. Even the statutes against witchcraft were not repealed until after France had set us the example, and many of our law-officers strenuously opposed the measure to the last !
Learning.-Too often a knowledge of words and an ignorance of things; a mere act of memory which may be exercised without common
Licenser (dramatic).-One who attempts to atone for his own licentiousness by over-acting the puritan and the rigorist towards others.
Loan.-A means of robbing our successors for the purpose of destroying our contemporaries.
Logic.-Substituting sound for sense, and perverting reason by reasoning
Logwood.- A dye much used in the manufacture of wine.
Longevity.–Adding a few years to the wrong end of life, and surviving oneself
Lottery.—The only game of chance where you are certain to lose your money.
Lorer.-One who in his desire to obtain possession of another has lost possession of himself.
Loyalty.—Sometimes a profession, sometimes a trade, sometimes art; generally self-love disguised as a love of the king.
Martyr.-That which all faiths have produced in about equal proportions; so much easier is it to die for religion than to live for it.
Marriage.-- Taking a yoke-fellow, who may lighten the burden of existence if you pull together, or render it insupportable if you drag
May.—“I had rather live twenty Mays," says Sir Thomas Wotton, “than forty Novembers," and yet in his old age he was anxious to prolong the winter of his days
“ And from the dregs of life thought to receive
What the first sprightly running would not give.” Medicine.-Guessing at Nature's intentions and wishes, and then endeavouring to substitute our own.
Melancholy.-Ingratitude to Heaven.
Misanthrope'.-One who is uncharitable enough to judge of others by himself.
Money, May be accused of injustice towards mankind,-inasmuch as there are only a few who make false money, whereas money makes
many men false.
Monastery.—A house of ill-fame, where men and women are seduced from their public duties, and generally fall into guilt from attempting to preserve an unnatural innocence.
Mouth.-An useless instrument to some people,—in as far as it rer ders ideas audible, but of special service for rendering victuals invisible.
Mummy.—A flesh statue--an immortal of the dead.
Muzzle.--A contrivance to prevent biting or barking, put upon the mouths of dogs in England, and upon those of human beings in the dominions of the Holy Alliance.
Negro.—A creature treated as a brute, because he is black, by greater brutes who happen to be white.
Nightingale. --The musician kindly appointed by Heaven to cheer us in the darkness.
Nobleman.--One who is indebted to his ancestors for a name and an estate, and not unfrequently to himself for being unworthy of both.
Nose.- See Snuff-box.
Nonsense.--Generally applied to any sense that happens to differ from our own.
November. The period at which every Englishman takes leave of the sun for nine months, and not a few of them for ever.
I love to hear at mournful eve
The ploughman's pensive tone,
When the last note is done.
And cross the gusty hill,
When all is hush'd and still.
How sweet it is to come,
Approach our pleasant home;
Along the village street,
The cheerful household nieet!
At length we reach our own,-
More kind by absence grown.
The threatening storm come on,-
And traveller alone.
And hear the kettle's hum,
“ How glad we are you're come!"
With heartfelt social mirth,
Like our own pleasant hearth.
THE CANADIAN EMIGRANT.-NO. I. After several years of active service, our battalion was re-formed, in the year 1816, and, like many others at the peace, I was thrown upon the world without fortune or profession. I was pressed by some friends to enter into their offices, and promised certain advancement; but I could not bear to think of submitting to the petty caprices of cold, calculating money-getters, after having for seven painful years lived the slave of military tyranny; and though my early education had qualified me for entering upon a learned profession, yet the time necessary for securing a subsistence by my own talents, my former habits of strenuous idleness, and the want of funds of my own to carry me through the trial, compelled me, without hesitation, to reject the choice of either. After looking about me for many months, and finding myself as far from a decided resolution as ever, I reluctantly accepted the invitation of a brother demi-solde, to settle in the wilderness of Upper Canada. To leave my native land at the moment I was beginning to enjoy it, was indeed painful to my feelings ; but then I had a prospect of becoming free and independent by a few years of active exertion ; and, at the worst, should be exposed to no scorn of the rich or powerful: but if adversity followed me to the New World, I could bear it boldly and recklessly, for “a stranger is a stranger in a strange land”— if I met no pity, I should feel no shame ;-unknowing and unknown I could exert myself as far as honour and integrity would sanction in any situation, without the reluctance I must necessarily feel on entering the ranks of common life in such an aristocratical country as England. Such were the impressions that induced me to promise my friend Bthat I would accompany him to America. For myself, how little soever I relished the predominant feelings of English society, I felt no love for America nor the Americans ; it was not, therefore, any political feeling, nor any romantic illusion of retirement in the woods, that had any influence on my decision. My resolution being once formed, 1 bustled through the preparations for my departure, and with a smiling face, but aching heart, jumped into the coach that conveyed us to Liverpool, there to embark for new scenes and adventures.
We decided on traversing the United States on our way to Upper Canada; and, accordingly, took our passage to New York. The evening before we embarked, I went out of the city alone, ascended a slight rising ground, and thence took a last survey of the wide prospect that lay before me of the wonders of commerce, the applications of science, and the splendid creations of wealth and knowledge. “Here," I said to myself, “is the last view I shall, perhaps, ever enjoy of the wonderful effects of human talent,—of the incessant dominion of mind over the properties of matter,-of civilized man over the distant and uncivilized regions of the earth! I go to scenes where Nature reigns supreme-where the influence of man is scarcely felt amidst the immensity of wilderness—where he appears only as the red hunter of the woods, or the wretched exile from distant and more genial climes. I am to lose the society that lightens all the evils of life, that makes life itself a boon—those friends whose smile gladdens the heart, whose sympathy consoles, whose experience guides :-all these I leave for cold, unsympathizing, uncultivated strangers,- for solitude in all its desolation,
--for seclusion from the very face of man;—and from the smile of woman, of educated woman, I must be for ever debarred. But why do I bring up these sad anticipations in ghostly perspective before my mental eye, when I must now stand the hazard of the die! Away, then, with regret! Let Adversity shower her pitiless arrows on my head : once embarked on the Western wave, my heart shall be steeled to fortune and to fate-every thought of the home of my fathers I will dissipate by constant exertion and by pressing forward to the hopes of the future. The wilderness I shall change into the fruitful field; I shall tame the wild Indian; guide the untutored emigrant; and, amidst the diversified cares of a rising colony, find no leisure to revert to the pleasures, bopes, or occupations of the country I have left behind.” Fired with the thought, I speedily re-entered the city, and retired to my chamber to dream of woods, waterfalls, Indian hunters, the rifle, and the tomahawk. Next morning we were at sea. say
that I was not sad on leaving England, would be untrue; but the second morning saw me rise careless of the past, and almost reckless of the future. Beyond the bounds of our vessel every thing was forgotten. I enjoyed, in a word, that delightful quietude which fine weather at sea can alone produce, when no fear of the future intrudes but “ such as fancy can assuage,' when every thought and feeling of the past is wholly obliterated from the mind. Whether other travellers have experienced at sea the same oblivion of care, I know not; but in my own case, the absence of mind was complete: every morning saw me rise calm and contented; every evening saw me retire to my couch careless of the morrow.
After a six weeks' passage we reached the bustling city of New York. The bay, with its beautiful islands, the neat houses and country-seats on the shore, offering to my fancy a grateful retreat from the toils and torments of European existence; and the city of “the Manhattans," rising proudly above the waters, surrounded by countless ships from every country on the globe, presented to me one of the most beautiful and interesting prospects I had ever beheld. Nor were we disappointed at the appearance of cultivated and uncultivated nature on the shore. The maize-fields were then waving in the full luxuriance of an American autumn; the gardens teemed with the finest fruits and most fragrant flowers; and the general impression made on me by the aspect of the New World, was one of joy and satisfaction. Notwithstanding their charms, New York, Hoboken, and Long Island did not detain us long; for like those who see an evil impending, and hasten forward to escape the anguish of suspense, we hastily left these interesting scenes, travelled by the steam-boat to Albany, thence on horseback to Lake Ontario, and, after visiting the falls of Niagara, reached York, the capital of Upper Canada.
We found here little to interest any one but a land-surveyor or a government-agent; the one to decoy the unwary emigrant to the free lands in the back settlements, and the other to pocket the fee required for making a grant. The fee for these poor lands is not much greater than the selling price of the most fertile tract! Not choosing to settle on the government lands, my friend and myself purchased two small sections that had been partially cleared by American emigrants, near the shores of Lake St. Clair, a few hundred miles from York; and we repaired immediately to our respective stations. Winter was approach