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that social felicity, that sway of reason, that emancipa-
tion from error, of which they eternally prate, as the
fruit of their doctrines ! Accept those doctrines, and
the whole world falls back into a frightful chaos; and
all the relations of life are confounded; and all ideas
of vice and virtue are reversed; and the most inviola-
ble laws of society vanish; and all moral discipline is

7. Accept those doctrines, and the government of
states and nations has no longer any cem’ent to up-
hold it; and all the harmony of the body politic be-
comes discord; and the human race is no more than
an assemblage of reckless barbarians, shameless, re-
morseless, brutal, denaturalized, with no other law
than force, no other check than passion, no other
bond than irreligion, no other God than self. Such
would be the world which impiety would make! Such
would be this world, were a belief in God and immor-
tality to die out of the human heart !

From the French of MASSILLON. (1717 1742.





COM'PASS (kům'pass), n., space ; an | VOY'AGE, n., a journey by sea.

instrument by which ships are PAT'TEN, N., a sort of shoe.

SUP'PLI-ANT, n., a humble petitioner.
CAN'vass, v. i., to solicit votes. Friv'o-Lous, a., slight; vain.
Sur'aeon, n., one who cures by the Mo-MENT'ous, a., important.
hand or by instruments.

MA-RINE' (-reen), a., helonging to
Ep'och (ep'ok or e'pok), n., era ; date.

the sea.
The au in haunt has the sound of a in far. In gov'ern-or, in'ter-est, ex'er-cise, heed
the sound of er ; in town and count'er, the sound of ou.

1. THE DULL RAZOR. "? Does this razor go easy ?” asked a barber of his eustomer, who was writhing les under a clumsy instrument, the chief recommendation in of which was a strong handle. -"Well," replied the

poor fellow," that depends upon what you call this operactici ation. If you 're skinning me, the razor goes tolerably quile easy; but if you're shaving me, it goes răther hard.”

“Does n't it take hold?" asked the barber. “Yes, it takes hold, but it won't let go," replied the victim. Arfix mana

2. How TO RUIN YOUR HEALTH. - A humorous contact writer gives the following rules for ruining health: Stop in bed late. Eat hot.

Eat hot.suppers. Turn day into night, and night into day. Take no exercise. Always ride when you can walk. Never mind about wet feet. Have half a dozen doctors. Take all the medicine they give you. Try every new quack. If that doesn't kill you, quack yourself.

3. CARRYING A JOKE TOO FAR. – A fellow stole a saw, and on his trial told the judge that he only took it in joke. “How far did you carry it?" inquired the judge. “Two miles," answered the prisoner.—“Ah! that's carrying a joke too far!” said the judge; and the prisoner was sentenced to hard labor, in the House of Correction, for three months.

4. Too OFFICIOUS. L " Your house is on fire!” exclaimed a stranger, rushing into the parlor of a pompous and formal citizen.-“Well, sir," replied the latter, “ to what cause am I indebted for the extraordinarynicien 's interest which you seem to take in the affairs of my house?

5. Making THE BEST OF THings. 7." I have told you,” says Southey, “ of the Spaniard who always put on spectacles when about to eat cherries, in order that the fruit might look larger and more tempting. In like manner I make the most of my enjoyments; and though I do not cast my eyes away from my troubles, I pack them in as small a compass as I can for myself, and never let them annoy others.”

6. FATE OF IDLERS. The man who did not think it was respectable to bring up his children to work

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has just heard from his three sons. One of them is a
driver on a canal ;

another has been taken up as a yurvagrant; and the third has gone to a certain public

institution, to learn to hammer stone, under a keeper.

7. REBUKING ARROGANCE.+ When Abernethy was heddli canvassing for the office of surgeon ́to St. Barthol

omew Hospital, in London, he called upon a rich
grocer, one of the governors. The great man behind
the counter, seeing the poor surgeon enter, immedi-
ately assumed the grand air toward the supposed sup-breeeria
pliant for his vote, and said: “I presyme, sir, you
want my vote and interest at this momentous epoch datu

your life.” Abernethy, who hated humbugs, and
felt nettled at the tone, replied, “No, I don't; I want
a pennyworth of figs. Come, look sharp, and wrap
them up; I want to be off!”ect

8. OPPOSITION TO REFORM. —"I do not mean,"—said the Rev. Sydney Smith, at a meeting, on the Reform Bill, —“I do not mean to be disrespectful; but the attempt of the Lords to stop the progress of reform, reminds me very forcibly of the great storm of Sidmouth, and of the conduct of the excellent Mrs. Partington on that occasion. In the winter of 1824, there set in a great flood upon that town; the tide rose to an incredible height; the waves rushed in upon the houses, and every thing was threatened with destruction.

“In the midst of this sublime and terrible storm, Dame Partington, who lived upon the beach, was seen at the door of her house, with mop and pattens, trundling the mop, squeezing out the sea-water, and vigorously pushing away the Atlantic Ocean. The Atlantic was roused. Mrs. Partington's spirit was up; but I need not tell you that the contest was unequal. The Atlantic Ocean beat Mrs. Partington. She was excellent at a slop or a puddle, but she should not have


meddled with a tempest. Gentlemen, be at your ease; be quiet and steady. You will beat Mrs. Partington.”

9. MURDERING A TUNE. -Foote once asked a man without a sense of a tūne in him, “Why are you for


16 Because it hare was the reply. — “No wonder," said Foote ; "you are forever murdering it.”

10. THE QUAKER'S RETORT. -- A Quaker and a hotheaded youth were, on a recent occasion, quarreling in the street. The man with the broad-brimmed hat kept his temper most ēquably, which seemed but to increase the anger of the other. “Fellow," said the latter, with an oath, “I don't know a bigger fool than you are.” “Stop, friend," replied the Quaker, " thou dost forget thyself.” 11. ON EARLY RISING.–Said Lord Chatham to his

on the curtains of your bed, and the walls of your chamber, 'If you do not rise early, you can make progress in nothing. If you do not set apart your hours of reading, if you suffer your, self or any one else to break in upon them, your days will slip through your hands unprofitable and frivolous, and unenjoyed by yourself.””

12. A STUPID QUESTION. — Professor Porson, being once at a dinner party, where the conversation turned

son : « I would internet

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the world, an ignorant young man, in order to contrib-geia

have ute his mite toward the general conversation, asked the professor, thoughtlessly, “ Pray, sir, was Cook killed on his first voyage ?–“I believe he was,” answered Porson, “ though he does not seem to have minded it much; for he immediately entered on a second."

13. THE JUDGE AND THE LAWYER. On a certain occasion, when pleading a cause at the bar, Lawyer angung


Brooks observed to Judge Rice, that he would con-
clude his remarks on the following day, unless the
Court would consent to set late enough for him to
finish them that evening. Sit, sir,” said the judge;
“not set : hens set." -- " I stand corrected, sir," replied
the lawyer, bowing. Not long after, the judge, while
giving an opinion in a marined case, asked, in regard
to a certain ship, “ At what Whart does she lay?"
Lie, may it please your honor," exclaimed Mr. Brooks;

not lay: hens lay.”


FIELD-MAR'SHAL, n., the commander | VIC-TOʻRIA, n., a Latin word, meaning
of an army.

The ew in news has the y sound of long u. Pronounce wound, woond.

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It gives him life and vigor ; bildi!

He grasps his horse's mane ;
He mounts, and lifts his trumpet

To his dying lips again.

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And all his strength he găthers
To hold it in his hand,

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