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Eva. The dozen white lowfes do become an old coat well; it agrees well paffant; it is a familiar beast to man, and fignifies love.
Shal. The luce is the fresh-fifh, the falt-fifh is an old
Slen. I may quarter, coz.
Shal. You may, by marrying.
Evan. It is marrying indeed, if he quarter it.
Shal. Not a whit.
Eva. Yes, per-lady; if he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three fkirts for your felf, in my fimple conjectures; but that is all one: if Sir John Falstaff have committed difparagements upon you, I am of the church, and will be glad to do my benevolence, to make atone- ▾ ment and compromifes between you.
Shal. The council fhall hear it; it is a riot.
Eva. It is not meet the council hear of a riot; there is no fear of Got in a riot: the council, look you, fhall defire to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot; take you viza-ments in that.
Shal. Ha! o'my life, if I were young again, the fword fhould end it.
Eva. It is petter that friends is the fword that end it; and there is also another device in my prain, which peradventure prings good difcretions with it: there is Anne Page, which is daughter to mafter George Page, which is pretty virginity.
Slen. Miftrefs Anne Page? fhe has brown hair, and fpeaks like a woman.
Eva. It is that ferry perfon for all the orld, as just as you will defire; and feven hundred pounds of monies, and gold and filver, is her grand-fire upon his death's-bed (Got deliver to a joyful refurrections) give when he is able to overtake feventeen years old: it were a good motion, if we leave our pribbles and prabbles, and defire a marriage between mafter Abraham and miftrefs Anne Page.
Slen. Did her grand-fire leave her feven hundred pound? Eva. Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny. Slen. I know the young gentlewoman; fhe has good gifts. Eva. Seven hundred pounds, and poffibility, is goot gifts.
Shal. Well; let us fee honeft Mr. Page: is Falstaff there? Eva. Shall I tell you a lie? I do defpife a liar as I do defpife one that is falfe; or as I defpife one that is not true. The Knight Sir John is there and I beseech you, be ruled by your well-wishers. I will peat the door [Knocks.] for master Page. What, hoa? Got blefs your house here.
SCENE II. Enter Mr. Page.
Page. Who's there?
Eva. Here is Got's pleffing, and your friend, and Juftice Shallow; and here's young mafter Slender; that peradventures shall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your likings.
Page. I am glad to fee your worfhips well. I thank you for my venison, master Shallow.
Shal. Mafter Page, I am glad to fee you; much good do it your good heart: I wish'd your venison better; it was ill kill'd. How doth good mistress Page? and I thank you always with my heart, la; with my heart.
Page. Sir, I thank you.
Shal. Sir, thank you; by yea and no, I do.
Page. It could not be judg'd, Sir.
Slen. You'll not confefs, you'll not confefs.
Shal. That he will not; 'tis your fault, 'tis your fault; 'tis a good dog.
Page. A cur, Sir.
Shal. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog; can there be more faid? he is good and fair. Is Sir John Falstaff here? Page. Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office between you.
Eva. It is fpoke as a chriftians ought to speak.
Shal. If it be confefs'd, it is not redrefs'd; is not that fo, mafter Page? he hath wrong'd me; indeed he hath; at a word he hath; believe me, Robert Shallow Efquire faith, he is wrong'd,"
Page. Here comes Sir John.
Enter Sir John Falstaff, Bardolph, Nym and Pistol. Fal. Now, mafter Shallow, you'll complain of me to the King?
Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, kill'd my deer, and broke open my lodge.
Fal. But not kifs'd your keeper's daughter.
Shal. Tut, a pin; this fhall be anfwer'd.
Fal. I will answer it ftrait: I have done all this. That is now anfwer'd.
Shal. The council fhall know this.
Fal. "Twere better for you if 'twere not known in council; you'll be laugh'd at.
Eva. Pauca verba, Sir John, good worts."
Fal. Good worts? good cabbage. Slender, I broke your head: what matter have you against me?
Slen. Marry, Sir, I have matter in my head against you, and against your cony-catching rafcals, Bardolph, Nym and Piftol.
Bar. You Banbury cheese !
Pift. How now, Mephoftophilus ?
Slen. Ay, it is no matter.
Nym. Slice, I fay, pauca, pauca: flice, that's my hu
Slen. Where's Simple my man? can you tell, coufin? Eva. Peace: I pray you: now let us understand; there is three umpires in this matter, as I understand; that is, mafter Page, fidelicet mafter Page; and there is myself, fidelicet myfelf; and the third party is, laftly and finally, mine hoft of the garter.
Page. We three to hear it, and end it between them.
Eva. Ferry goot; I will make a prief of it in my notebook, and we will afterwards ork upon the caufe with as great difcretions as we can.
Pift. He hears with ears.
Eva. The tevil and his tam! what phrafe is this, he hears with ear? why, it is affectations.
Fal. Piftol, did you pick mafter Slender's purfe? Slen. Ay, by thefe gloves did he, or I would I might never come in mine own great chamber again elfe, of feven groats in mill-fixpences, and two Edward fhovel-boards, that coft me two fhilling and two pence a-piece, of Yead Miller; by thefe gloves.
Fal. Is this true, Piftol?
Eva. No; it is falfe, if it is a pick-purfe.
Pift. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner! Sir John, and ma-
Nym. Be advis'd, Sir, and pafs good humours: I will fay marry trap with you, if you run the nuthooks-humour on me; that is the very note of it.
Slen. By this hat, then he in the red face had it; for tho' I cannot remember what I did when you made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass.
Fal. What fay you, Scarlet and John?
Bard. Why, Sir, for my part, I fay, the gentleman had drunk himself out of his five fentences.
Eva. It is his five fenses: fie, what the Ignorance is? Bard. And being fap, Sir, was, as they fay, cashier'd ; and fo conclufions paft the car-eires.
Slen. Ay, you fpake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter; I'll never be drunk whilft I live again, but in honeft, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I be drunk, I'll be drunk with thofe that have the fear of God, and not with drunken knaves.
Eva. So Got udg me, that is a virtuous mind.
Fal. You hear all thefe matters deny'd, gentlemen; you hear it.
Enter Miftrefs Anne Page, with wine.
Page. Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll drink within. [Exit Anne Page.
* Nutbook was a word of reproach in the vulgar way and in the cant-strain. In the fecond part of Hen. 4. Dol Tearsheer fays to the Beadle, Nathook, Nutbook! jou lie. Probably it was a name given to a Bayliff or Catchpole, very odious to the common people.
Slen. Oh heav'n! this is miftrefs Anne Page.
Fal. Miftrefs Ford, by my troth, you are very well
Page. Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome: come, we have a hot venifon pafty to dinner; come, gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness. [Exe.Fal.Page,&c. SCENE IV. Manent Shallow, Evans and Slender.
Slen. I had rather than forty fhillings I had my book of fongs and fonnets here. [Enter Simple.] How now, Simple, where have you been? I muft wait on myself, must If you have not the book of riddles about you, have you? Simp. Book of riddles ! why, did you not lend it to Alice Shortcake upon Alhollowmas last, a fortnight afore Martlemas?
Shal. Come, coz, come, coz; we stay for you: a word with you, coz: marry this, coz ; there is, as 'twere, a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here: do you understand me?
Slen. Ay, Sir, you fhall find me reasonable: if it be fo, I fhall do that is reason.
Shal. Nay, but understand me.
Slen. So I do, Sir.
Eva, Give ear to his motions, Mr. Slender: I will description the matter to you, if you be capacity of it.
Slen. Nay, I will do as my coufin Shallow fays: I pray you, pardon me he's a Juftice of peace in his country, fimple tho' I ftand here.
Eva. But that is not the question: the queftion is concerning your marriage.
Shal. Ay, there's the point, Sir.
Eva. Marry is it; the very point of it, to Mrs. Anne Page. Slen. Why, if it be fo, I will marry her upon any reafonable demands.
Eva. But can you affection the 'oman? let us command to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; divers philofophers hold, that the lips is parcel of the mind: therefore precifely, can you marry your good will to the maid?